The Mockingjay Continues to Sing
by Georgina93
Summary: Katniss' life after the final chapter and before the epilogue. Katniss and Peeta are together now but with the demons of their pasts still haunting them will they be able to keep their hold on reality? Rated T just in case.
1. The Visitor

I stare out of my kitchen window across the meadow, into the woods. I can almost see the animals moving round, beginning their day sniffing out food and searching for water. Usually I would be leaving my house at this time wearing my father's old hunting jacket letting the smooth old leather hug my skin my beloved bow and arrow in my hand. Not today though. Today is my wedding day.

Peeta has been waiting for this day for a year now. The day when finally, we will be joined together for the rest of our lives. I know that he has been struggling to contain his excitement, he has loved me since the day he saw me and his one dream is finally coming true. I have surprised him by how involved I have been with all the planning, he thought that I wouldn't want to have to come under so much stress and pressure, he thought I would break. Truthfully I nearly did break down several times but I really did want this wedding to happen. When we first started planning six short months ago I realised how much I was in love with Peeta, how badly I wanted to be with him. Forever. All that time I was pretending in the first Hunger Games I never realised my true feelings for him, it was not until I thought he was dead after he hit that force field, that feeling of wanting more when I kissed him on the beach that I really realised how I felt. My train of thought stops after that I never go any further, my memories after the Quarter Quell become to painful. I can never forgive my self for what I did to Peeta. Although the Capitol tortured him to the point where he forget everything I feel that if I had shown him true love he would've been able to hang on, keep the last of his sanity until we could save him.

'Katniss?' The voice behind makes me to jump

'Yes?' I respond

'Were ready for you.'

I turn to see my mother, she's smiling. This will be the first and last time she will send her child down the aisle, there is no more younger sister to follow. I've always thought that maybe if Prim had survived she would've been the first to marry. She would never have messed things up the way I did.

'Let's go.'

My mothers soft voice interrupts my thoughts again her hand outstretched. I take it and walk with her up the stairs to my, soon to be our, bedroom. My prep team is waiting. They squeal as I walk in. I listen to their greetings, their horror over the state of me as they begin to get me ready. File my nails, brush my hair, paint colour onto my pale face.

When they are done, they step back admiring their handiwork. I stand up and walk to the mirror, I barely recognize myself. Although the make-up has been kept very minimal, at my request, I look fresh and awake. My sallow, white cheeks have been replaced with full, rosy ones, my hair pulled up into a beautiful, satiny bun, my lips look pink and pearly and lastly my eyes, even they have life in them that had disappeared for over a year.

'You look beautiful Katniss.'

My mother starts to cry bringing on tears from my prep team as well. If only Cinna could be here. She stands up and takes my hand.

'My daughter.' She whispers

I kiss her on the cheek and she turns and ushers my prep team out.

'I have something to give you Katniss, it's from a very special person.'

She turns to my cupboard and draws out the most beautiful wedding dress I have ever seen. Only one pair of hands could've made it.

'Something new.' She whispers

'Cinna!' I gasp 'He knew.'

She nods. The dress is not like the other wedding dresses Cinna created for me this one is simple yet beautiful a silky ivory, the bodice decorated with small flowers, the sleeves a fine lace. As I step into it I feel how well it fits, it hugs my waist before cascading down to below my ankles. I am amazed at how Cinna knew that one day I really would be marrying Peeta. He has created the most perfect dress. His wedding gift to me.

I turn to the mirror again. It is my turn to cry. As the tears fall down my face I realise they are the first happy ones I have ever shed. My prep team re-enters and right on cue, they begin to cry again. My mother pulls out the last part of Cinna's gift, a stunning diamond tiara with a tulle veil attached. She places it on my head. The final touch. Just then the doorbell rings.

'That can't be Peeta!' Fulvia cries

'Its not.' I answer. 'Peeta believes in tradition.'

I move out of my room and down the steps I pull my veil back over my head before I open the door. The familiar voice is a complete shock to my ears.

'Hey Catnip.'

I slam the door shut.


	2. Past Becomes Present

I stand behind the closed door, palms pressed against it. Gale. I haven't seen him since the day I shot Coin. I still don't feel ready, Prim's death continues to linger over me day to day and although I know Gale did not mean for it to happen it was his bombs that caused her death. My mother emerges at the top of the stairs.

'Is everything alright Katniss?' Fear evident in her voice

'I, I don't know.'

I turn around to open the door deciding that I have to face him sooner or later after all, he is my best friend. I open the door a big smile plastered on my face, I'm not quite sure if it's real or fake.

'Well' Gale says 'That's one way to be…'

But his voice trails off, his eyes begin to look me up and down confusion spreading over his face and then I see the hurt in his eyes.

'You're getting married.' It's not really a question but I still respond.

'Yes.'

'To Mellark?' I hear the spite in his voice.

'Yes.'

He just stands there staring at me, his face unreadable. This is a first for me, I have _always_ been able to tell what Gale is thinking. Maybe it's because I haven't seen him in so long, maybe it's because I've never seen him so hurt.

'You look beautiful Katniss.'

Now I can see inside his head. He's thinking of what our marriage would be like, our happily ever after and I see that Gale is still not over me.

'Why don't you come in?' I ask softly

He steps into the house bending his head slightly as the doorway is too low, I think he's grown since I last saw him or maybe I'm just comparing him to Peeta. I take him through the kitchen and sit by the table gesturing for him to do the same.

'Why are you here?'

He is evidently not here for my wedding.

'I had some free time away from District 2 so I decided to come visit my family.' He pauses 'And you.'

I watch him I can see he's holding back what he really wants to say. I swallow.

'Just say it Gale.' I shock myself, I'm not really sure if I want to hear what he has to say.

'Why him Katniss? Why not me?' He whispers 'You've known me for so much longer. I've always been there for you, damn it I was with you right until the end. Even when you gave up I was still there to fight for you and at least I didn't forget about you.'

This last line angers me.

'He was tortured Gale.' My voice rises an octave 'Tortured to the point where he could remember nothing, not you, not me and not even himself.'

Tears are pricking my eyelids but I remind myself not to cry, not to ruin my make-up. I continue.

'Gale, you are my best friend. You're even more, you're my brother but Peeta, he just has this way with me, he loves me so much and although initially I was confused time has shown me how much I love him. He means the world to me and when I nearly lost him, when forgot about me, no longer loved me I felt pain I'd never felt before and all I wanted was to have him back like I'd lost one of the most important parts of me. I realised how I couldn't be with out him. All that time in the arena when I thought I was acting now I see that really I wasn't I just couldn't see my feelings. I love him Gale, I'm happy with him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I could never let you go, loose you either but please see how happy I am. More happy than I ever thought I could be.'

I realise that at some point I have risen to my feet and I sit back down again taking deep breaths. 'Keep calm Katniss, Keep calm.' I recite in my head, words that have become all to familiar in this last year.

'So you're just going to give up on me then?'

I see anger I have never seen in Gale's eyes before, not even when he was battling for the Capitol, fighting against the people who caused so much pain and suffering to children, families, whole districts.

'I'm not giving up on you.' I'm shouting now. 'Did you not listen? Can you not see I'm happy?'

'I don't know Katniss, I just don't know.' Gale mumbles

'You don't know do you. You're so blinded by your own feelings that you can't think of anyone else.'

I immediately regret these words but there's no turning back now.

'If you'll excuse me I have a wedding to attend.'

I storm out of the kitchen turning around to face Gale again.

'If you'll be so kind as to see yourself out.'

I leave no longer caring about what he has to say.


	3. Something Blue

I'm still running over what happened in my head when I realise I'm standing outside Peeta's house. I step back remembering that the groom must not see the bride before the wedding ceremony. I guess it's natural instinct to run for Peeta, his arms are the only ones that can comfort me, his voice the only one that can soothe me. I turn and walk away focusing on keeping a steady pace as I approach my front door, I take a couple of deep breaths before pushing the door open. I'm greeted by the concerned faces of my mother and prep team greet me.

'What happened?' Flavius exclaims

'Now is not the time Flavius.' My mother's cool voice responds

One look from her tells me she knows that I'm stressed; I haven't given her enough credit over the years for how much she actually knows me.

'I just need to grab something.' I lie pushing my way into the kitchen.

Gale's gone. He must have jumped over the garden wall, there's no other way out. I notice something sat on the table. A piece of ribbon in the most brilliant shade of blue I have ever seen, I pick it up admiring the colour noticing a soft green tinge. It's simple yet beautiful and in a time when there was nothing except grey in District 12 this would be highly treasured. I notice a note sat on the table I pick it up reading the familiar handwriting. '_Something blue. I picked this up whilst travelling through 4. You'd never seen the sea so I thought I'd bring it to you._' Gale has given me the sea as a wedding gift and I can tell by the note he wants me to wear it during the ceremony.

'Something blue.' I recite twisting the ribbon through my hands.

I walk back out of the kitchen. Everyone still stands right where I left them, concern replaced with confusion.

'Venia, can you put this in my hair?'

'Of course.' She says brightly 'Lovely colour, so vibrant.'

'It's meant to be the sea. Have you ever seen the sea Venia?'

'No, but the rivers in the Capitol look quite similar.' She replies 'There.'

I touch my bun and notice she's tied the ribbon around it, a small pin at the bottom keeping it in place.

'Great.' I smile 'Thanks.'

'Now all that's left is something old.' Squeals Octavia

'I've not got something borrowed yet.' I remind her

'Oh, we've got that covered.' She giggles

Flavius produces a small bracelet, the flowers entwined throughout.

'It's beautiful.' I whisper

'And yours.' Says Octavia

'For now.' Flavius adds

'Thank you, thank you very much. I'll wear it with pride.'

In a flash they're all hugging me, we embrace for a few moments before a small cough interrupts us. My mother beckons me into the study; she makes sure the door is firmly closed before she turns to me.

'What happened Katniss?' Her tone is deep

'We just, we argued. I don't want to talk about it.'

She looks hurt and another pang of guilt runs through me. I'm still not quite ready to open up to my mother yet; I guess years of not having trust in someone will take a while to fix.

'I don't want it to ruin my day.' I say

She smiles and I feel a bit better. I decide its time to change the conversation.

'Now, what are we going to do about something old?'

'I've got that covered.' She replies

She walks over to the desk and picks up a small box. I admire it, the old cracked leather and the slightly fading deep red colouring. She brings it over to me a glint in her eye.

'Something old.'

She opens the top and I gasp.

'Oh my goodness!'

It's my mockingjay pin.

I just stare at for a minute looking over the aged, gold bird. I thought I'd lost it, or it had been taken away from me I never knew my mother had it all along.

'I thought that this pin, well it's part of your past and although it contains some painful memories something that's been with you through all your fights and struggles should be with you when you leave the darkness and come back out into the light.'

Her words touch me. I really haven't given my mother credit, she gave up but so did I. Before it all began I never understood how she could just give up, stop fighting but after having to fight my own battles, physically and emotionally, I have learnt just how easy it is to succumb to your inner weakness to try and forget the world around you.

'It's perfect, the best gift yet.'

And I mean it.

I take her hand one last time.

'Let's go get married.'

We walk out of the house and into the street heading in the direction of the meadow. My heart is starting to beat faster now and my pace quickens slightly but my mother's hand gives me a reassuring squeeze and I calm down a little. She's done this before; she knows how I'm feeling. As we begin to reach the meadow I hold her hand a little tighter, I need her with me. Slowly the venue begins to come into view it's a simple wedding with few guests, the Capitol people still think Peeta and I are married, but it is the way we wanted it. The benches either side of the aisle are covered in white drapes, the arch in the centre has lilies woven through it and around the edges lilies sit atop silver poles. My mother leads me to a bush a little way from the aisle.

'To keep you out the way of Peeta's eyes.' She winks at me.

'Sweetheart' A voice from behind me calls

I turn around and I'm shocked by what I see. Haymitch, without a bottle in his hand and completely…

'Sober.' He says 'I know I'm impressed too.'

'Thankyou Haymitch.' I hug him

'It's did it for your special day, for you. Besides…nevermind.'

I know what he's going to say though 'He still owes me.' Because I have no father Haymitch agreed to give me away, there's only one other person I would have asked but it would have caused him too much pain. I'm happy with Haymitch though although not everything is resolved he did keep me alive, which in turn kept Peeta alive.

'Are you ready?' My mother asks.

I pause 'Yes.'

She gives me a kiss on the cheek and hands me a bouquet made of evening primrose, a reminder that my darling sister is still with me for this big day. There's a proud look in her eyes as she slowly walks away. The music begins to play as she proceeds down the aisle, she will be my only bridesmaid. Haymitch offers me his arm I loop mine through his. He looks at me as I take a deep breath, attempting to calm my nerves.

He smiles 'Anything to say?'

'Just don't let me trip.'

We both laugh and walk out from behind the bush.

* * *

**More of the story to come tomorrow! Thankyou for all your kind reviews they've been so nice to read, I love receiving any ideas and constructive criticism. Stay tuned for the wedding! :)**

**-Isabel  
**


	4. The Wedding

**Here is the wedding chapter a lot of you have been waiting for. Thanks for your patience and I hope you enjoy it!**

* * *

The butterflies in my stomach are really jumping around now; I cling tighter to Haymitch focusing on walking in time. I look up and I see Peeta, standing at the end of the aisle, smiling. I notice the evening primrose pinned to his suit, it's orange but soft like the sunset, his favourite colour. He's wearing a charcoal grey suit, his smooth blonde hair combed back, his eyes are sparkling in the sunlight the smile now spreads even wider as I lock eyes with him. It takes every fiber of my being to stop myself from running down the aisle, to get closer to him. As I continue walking I notice all the familiar faces, Effie, Annie and young Trident, Greasy Sae, even Gale's mother and siblings are there. There's no Gale, though I didn't expect him to come I still wish he were here. I reach the end of the aisle and my mother embraces me, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek before sitting back down. I am now by Peeta's side he turns to me positively beaming and the ceremony begins.

'We are gathered here today to celebrate with Katniss and Peeta as they share their vows of everlasting love. Who gives this women to be married to this man?'

'Her mother and I.' Haymitch answers. He places my hand in Peeta's and takes his seat.

The ceremony continues in a blur until the most important part, our vows. I am so nervous now that I nearly fall over.

'Katniss, would you like to share your vows of love with Peeta?'

I steal a quick glance at my small prompts card.

'Yes.'

I clear my throat and begin.

'Peeta, I promise to be the most loving, faithful wife. To listen to you when you have problems, to be there for you when you need me most. I promise to try and not abandon you for the woods.' This receives a collective round of laughter. 'To value your opinion even if I disagree, to spend my time with you, to make you laugh in your moments of sadness. I promise to love you forever and always.'

As I finish I see several people in the crowd are crying I look up and see that even Peeta's eyes are slightly glassy. I smile at him before the reverend interrupts us.

'Peeta, would you like to share your vows of love for Katniss?'

'Of course.' He begins. 'Katniss, I promise to stand beside you forever, to hold your hand when you need it most and to be there to catch you when you fall. I promise to love you with every piece of my existence, to hold you when you cry and be there to guide you out of the darkness. I promise to give you the family you deserve, to bring a smile to your face daily and to protect you from any harm. Lastly, I promise to never stop fighting for our love.'

When he finishes the tears begin to spill from my eyes, I no longer care if I ruin my make-up, all I want to do it hold Peeta in my arms to finally be married to such a wonderful, wonderful man.

'Peeta, do you promise to stay faithful to your vows of love? To be with Katniss and love her as long as you both shall live?'

'I do.'

'Katniss, do you promise to stay faithful to your vows of love? To be with Peeta and love him as long as you both shall live?'

My voice cracks 'I do.'

'I now declare you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.'

Peeta leans forwards takes me in his arms and kisses me. That feeling of hunger inside me starts growing, beginning as a fireball in my heart and spreading through me, warming my body. I have to remind myself that we have an audience and I reluctantly break away facing the crowd now standing and clapping. I'm surprised by the amount of people that have come to see us. We walk back up the aisle hand in hand, the jovial music playing. Mayor Rivers has kindly offered to host our dinner and after party at the new town hall. As we leave the venue I turn to Peeta.

'Those were the most beautiful vows I ever heard Peeta. I want you to know that I truly love you with all my heart, body and soul.'

He smiles at me.

'I love you too Katniss, I meant what I said. I can never love anybody as much as I love you. I can't wait to be together, to start our married life, create a new chapter filled with happiness and love.'

I lean forward and passionately kiss him. This overwhelming feeling of love spreading through my body, I know that I cannot love another man as much as I love Peeta.

* * *

**THE WEDDING PARTY**

Nearly the whole of District 12 is gathered in the new town hall. The inside is simple, just like the venue. White drapes lining the wall with Lilies and Evening Primrose as the centerpiece for every table. Candles illuminating the flowers giving them a warm glow. The tables are placed around the dance floor where most of the night's partying will take place. Once the tables are filled the food is served, the food outshines the new, proper food District 12 has been given and I can tell it has been brought specially from the Capitol. About halfway through the dinner Haymitch stands up and taps his glass for attention. He's not drunk, yet. When the hall falls quiet he opens his mouth.

'I just wanted to make a speech to the bride and groom. Katniss and Peeta. You know Katniss I never thought you'd end up married, you seemed to grumpy to ever seem attractive to me.' There's a small round of laughter, myself included. 'But this guy.' He points to Peeta. 'This guy saw what I could not see, a truly fantastic, brave women who will fight for what she believes and who she loves. And he, he's a fantastic guy with the biggest heart. I have no doubt that you will look after each other,' He hiccups 'for the rest of your lives.'

There's a loud smattering of applause that is soon silenced as my mother stands up.

'I also wanted to make a small speech.' She smiles. 'My daughter is the most fantastic daughter in the world. She looked after us all when I gave up she protected as from danger and kept us from starvation. I can never thank you enough for what you did for your sister and I, ever.' I notice a tear roll down her cheek. 'I'm so glad that you have met this amazing man who loves you so much. I cannot wait to have you in the family Peeta. You deserve each other. Cheers.'

She raises her glass and a collective round of 'Cheers!' echoes through the hall. I lean over and give Peeta a quick kiss, I pull away smiling.

'And here's to our own happy future.' I say

Everyone's glasses rise once more.

'Now for the first dance.' I call

I take Peeta's hand as he leads me to the dance floor. He puts his hand around my waist and I rest mine on his shoulder. The soft, melodic music begins starts playing as we spin around the dance floor.

'I had no idea you could dance so well.' Peeta whispers in my ear

'I had a lot of time to practice with Prim.' I whisper back.

Although she is not here I can still feel her presence in the room, I see her smiling at us, sharing our tears and laughter. Too soon the first dance is over and the music picks up as people begin to flood the dance floor. The night passes by as one big, happy celebration. I dance with most of District 12 and I make sure to see Effie and thank her for the food she brought with her. I also pay Annie and Trident a visit; Annie seems to be holding up well, if anything she looks better than when I last saw her.

'He swims like his father.' She shouts with glee

'I'm so glad to hear it.'

She smiles at me before Trident starts tugging on her dress hem begging her to dance some more. It's gone midnight before the celebrations end and as a crowd of smiling faces waves us off I can feel the first signs of tiredness creeping over me. We approach my, now our, house and Peeta stops me before we reach the door. With one swoop of his strong arms he carries me over the threshold.

'Ahh, tradition,' I say

He just gives me his cheeky, lopsided smile before he places another kiss on my lips. He leads me up the stairs to our bedroom, which has been transformed, candles and primrose petals spread over the room making it feel warm and intimate. I lean into him and I feel his hands move down my back, slowly un-buttoning my dress. I relax as he begins to kiss my neck and let a new feeling spread through me, one I have not felt before, desire. He lays me down on the bed, the soft petals against my skin. I kiss him, all the desire and compassion spilling out. The night ends traditionally.

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**I hope you guys liked it, please leave a review it's so greatly appreciated. Thanks for all the support! More tomorrow!**

**-Isabel**


	5. Flashbacks

**So the Wedding's been and gone, it's now time for Katniss and Peeta to begin their first year of marriage. But it's not going to be very easy.**

* * *

I wake up in my bed the next morning and realise I'm shivering; only the white sheets cover my skin. I reach out seeking Peeta's warmth only to find an empty space beside me. I sit up and grab my robe pulling it around my naked body and begin to trudge downstairs. I find Peeta in the kitchen making breakfast; I stand silently in the doorway for a while just watching him, the way his hands work so smoothly. Baking for Peeta is like shooting a bow and arrow for me, natural. He turns around and sees me, a smile instantly breaks out on his face.

'Good morning beautiful.'

He walks over to me and wraps his arms around me. I bury my head into the crook of his neck; it always feels so right, so perfect to hold Peeta.

'You're cold.' My hair muffles his voice.

'And you're warm, so hold me just a little longer.'

He does, simply standing there as I breathe in his familiar smell. I still want to keep a hold of him as he breaks away.

'Breakfast? I made your favourite, cheese buns and some bacon.'

I smile and walk over to the table. That's the thing with Peeta, he always thinks about what others want. I don't deserve him.

'I can't believe were married.' I think aloud

'I know.'

'I couldn't be more happier Peeta. You know that, right?'

'Of course I do Katniss. I love you.'

I smile before answering. The words come so easy.

'I love you too.'

He walks over and places the bread and bacon in front of me. I begin eating; he knows how to make good food.

'I thought that maybe today I could take you out into the woods, teach you a bit about using a bow and arrow. Maybe even get you to help catch tonight's dinner, would you like that?' I swallow 'Peeta?'

I look up and I see why he's not responding. His face has contorted into an expression of pain, his knuckles turning white as he grips the back of the chair, his whole body shaking. Fear immediately runs through me, I know this look too well. A flashback.

'Peeta?'

I reach out and touch his hand.

'Peeta?' Alarm begins to fill my voice

I give his hand a vigorous shake now and he jolts back to reality. The pain leaves his face but still no colour returns. A manages a hoarse whisper.

'I'm sorry. I just,I...'

He turns runs out of the kitchen. I make to follow him but I think better of it, I know that flashbacks can block out any sense of reality, cause you to do stupid things, even aggressive things as a result of the visions you are seeing. I've had enough of them to know exactly how they work. I sit in silence, slowly finishing my breakfast. When he doesn't return I place Peeta's breakfast back on the stove to keep it warm whilst he's out of the room. I begin to wash up, filling the silence with the clunk of the saucepan against the sides of the sink. Peeta walks back in and wraps his arms around my waist.

'I'm sorry.' He whispers

'You have nothing to be sorry for Peeta. Neither of us can help it when a flashback hits.' I pause 'You better eat your breakfast, I plan to work you hard in the woods today.'

I turn around and give him a quick kiss before handing him his breakfast. I have to tread lightly after a flashback; you never quite know when all the images have been cleared from someone's head.

* * *

**Later That Morning**

Peeta and I walk out to the meadow my bow and arrow in hand, the game bag slung over his shoulder. When we reach the fence I pause, listening for the hum that means it's live. I know it never will be but I guess it's just instinct. As we approach the woods the familiar sounds of wildlife fill my ears and I breathe in the smell of nature, I am truly at home here. This used to be Gale's and my place but now I want to make it mine and Peeta's. I turn around and press my finger against my lip, indicating for him to be quiet; it is not long before I have shot two squirrels and a turkey.

'Your turn.' I say to Peeta

'Oh no Katniss, I can't shoot to save my life.'

' I know, that's why I'm going to teach you.'

His worried face makes me laugh.

'It's not that difficult, honest. Now come here.'

He sidles over to me giving me his trademark lopsided grin that makes my heart melt. I place the bow and arrow in his hand.

'Now, I want you to load the bow.'

He takes a arrow from my back and places it on the bow, making sure the end is against the string.

'Good. Now draw the bowstring until the end of the arrow is by your lip.' This is second nature to me.

He copies my instructions. Slowly drawing the string back until it's in line with his lip.

'Ok. Now close one eye and focus on a target, but make sure it's a clear one.'

I can see his eyes training in on a target.

'Make sure you have it in focus.'

His eyes squint slightly.

'Good, now shoot.'

He lets the string go and the arrow flies forwards hitting the edge of a tree.

'Hmm, it was meant to hit the centre.' He sighs.

'That's really good for a first go Peeta!' I protest. 'You just need to practice some more.'

He keeps trying, loading the bow, focusing on a target and letting go. Each time getting faster and closer to a bull's eye. Eventually he turns to me.

'I like watching you when you shoot Katniss.'

I can't help but smile as he hands me the bow and arrow.

'Ok, give me a target.'

He points to a tree several meters away, this should be easy. I load the bow and have the arrow ready to fire when I nearly faint from what I see. Standing by the target tree, is Prim.

* * *

**Dun, dun dun! I hope you guys like the surprise twist at the end! Chapter 6 will be out as soon as possible. Please Review, I love to read your comments even if they do contain some constructive criticism and especially when they include your ideas. Thanks all!**

**-Isabel**


	6. The Chase

**So Katniss has seen Prim in the forest. Her beloved sister has come back to her but is she real or fake?**

* * *

'Prim!' I scream.

She turns and begins to run away I immediately chase after her still desperately calling her name.

'Prim! Prim! Come back Prim, come back home!'

I keep running, my legs pounding against the hard earth. I have to catch her, I have to get her. I run faster my breathing becoming ragged, my lungs burning as they beg for air, but I can't give up. I must get Prim. I can't see her now but still I continue running desperately searching the leafy undergrowth for her. There! I see it; a small flash of golden hair slightly to the left of me, I turn quickly and begin to pursue it. I keep going judging where to go on the occasional flash of golden hair. Now I have to slow down, have to let my lungs get some oxygen. I stop, exhausted my chest heaving as a gulp in lung fulls of air. I rest my hands on my knees doubling my body over as I try to calm my heartbeat.

'Prim.' The soft moan escapes my lips. 'Prim, where are you?'

It is not the sight of Prim that makes me take off again. Now I'm not running to catch someone, I'm running to get away from something. The golden brown eyes trained on me are all too familiar, the sharp white teeth as they glisten in the sunlight, the great shuddering black body. A mutt. I have now become Prim, running away from danger, trying to escape the claws of the huge dog bearing down on me. I know this feeling all to well. I hear a scream and it takes me a second to realise it's my own. I keep running, trying to get away, trying not to be eaten by that great mutt. I hear Haymitch's voice.

'Here's some advice, stay alive.'

'I will Haymitch.' I gasp. 'I will.'

It's getting difficult now; the hard flat ground has turned into a muddy hill. I can't keep going, my heart feels like it's about to explode and there's no more air left for me to breath. The scenery suddenly changes the leafy green forest retreating as the pebbly beach surrounding the lake begins to emerge. I reach the edge and collapse onto the ground, I can hear the mutt's breathing now as it begins to approach me, see it's white teeth getting ready to rip me apart. The last thing I see before I black out are its malicious golden brown eyes staring into my soul.

* * *

I wake up in a strange bed. The pristine white sheets scratchy against my skin, the pajamas I am wearing unfamiliar. They smell of strong cleaning fluid, come to think of it the whole room does. I sit up and look around, wincing at the bright fluorescent light filling the room. It takes a moment for me to gather my bearings realise where I am, a hospital wing. Other beds around me have curtains drawn around them some have been left open, like mine. I don't recognise this hospital though, it's not the one from back home in District 12 but it's not nearly high tech enough to belong in the Capitol either. I start to panic not hearing the doors at the end of the aisle open.

'Katniss, your awake.' I snap my head around at Peeta's voice.

'Peeta, where am I?' I sound hysterical.

'It's all right Katniss. You're in District 4 at your mother's hospital.'

He approaches me, wrapping his arms around me. His touch feels so good; I slowly begin to calm down as I bury my face into his chest, breathing his smell in.

'What happened?' My voice wavers slightly.

'We were in the woods and you were teaching me to shoot, remember?' I nod. 'You thought you saw Prim and you took off after her, I was chasing after you and calling your name but you just kept going. I lost you for a while but then you screamed and I was able to get s sense of what direction you were going in. I eventually found you at the lake; you were unconscious, only I thought you were dead. You scared me Katniss, I thought I'd lost you.'

'I'm, I'm sorry Peeta.' I begin to cry.

He holds me tighter burying his head into my hair as he gently soothes me. My sobs eventually turn into quiet sniffles.

'How did I get here?' I whisper.

'Well, I took you to the hospital in 12 but there was nothing they could do for you because you weren't,' He pauses. 'you weren't physically damaged.'

We sit in silence for a moment as his words begin to sink in.

'So you took me here with my mother. But why not the Capitol?'

'Here's closer and we figured you would rather wake up here than in a hospital in the Capitol, thought it would bring back to many bad memories.'

I nod. I just stay sat on the bed wrapped in Peeta's arms squeezing my eyes shut, wishing this would all just go away. I hear the door open again and loud footfalls begin to approach us.

'Morning Katniss.'

Peeta pulls away from me as my mother approaches us.

'How are you feeling?' She asks, placing a cool hand against my forehead. 'Your fevers nearly gone, so that's good.'

I suddenly notice that I am a little warmer than I should be, but then again I have just been in Peeta's arms. I look up and see the worry in my mother's eyes, she notices and immediately tries to mask it but to no avail. I pull her in for a hug, realising she probably thought she had lost another daughter. She eventually pulls away.

'Guess who we have managed to get for you, . He agreed to come and see you, work through your troubles, try and get these visions out of your head.'

I give a weak smile, hoping this shows my appreciation.

'In fact, I'll go get him.'

She turns her shoes squeaking back down the aisle. Peeta and I sit in silence until she re-enters right behind her.

'Hello Katniss. What seems to be the problem?'

As I look up into his eyes I can see what he's thinking, there is nothing her can do. The darkness of my past can not be undone.

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**I hope you guys liked it! I just want to warn you that I might not be able to post this week as school work is crazy! I'll try and post on the weekend. Please read and review, any ideas and constructive criticism is most welcome! :)**

**-Isabel**


	7. A Safe Haven

**Here's Chapter 7! Thankyou to Kaitlyn for the really nice review from Chapter 5. I didn't get many reviews last chapter, did you guys not like it? Please review because they keep me knowing that you want more!  
**

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I've been in hospital for a week now. has been trying to get me to list key parts of my life in an attempt to help me get a hold on reality. I run the list through my head…

_My name is Katniss Everdeen. I am married to Peeta Mellark. Which means I am not Katniss Everdeen, I am Katniss Mellark. I live in District 12. I survived the Hunger Games. Twice. I was the Mockingjay. I fought against the Capitol with the rebels. The rebels won. I am no longer in the Hunger Games. I am now living a happy life. My past is no longer my present._

I recite this list to myself daily, sometimes even twice but the flashbacks still don't leave me. Even in the day I am never truly safe. Peeta helps as much as he can but what can he do when he is haunted by flashbacks too. I dread to think what Peeta's are like, distorted images of his past flickering through his brain, the feeling that he is back in the Capitol prison cells being tortured. If mine are bad Peeta's must be unbearable.

'Good afternoon Katniss.'

I jump a foot into the air at the sound ' ' voice, jolting me from my thoughts.

'It's alright its only me, .'

'I know.' I grumble.

I must look like a rabbit in the woods, over cautious and jumping at the slightest noise. I continue to stare out of the window my back facing , I don't feel like trying to 'find the light ray in the dark' today.

takes a breath, he always seems to know what I'm thinking.

'I thought that maybe today we could focus on places that make you happy. Places that, no matter what, make you feel at peace.'

My immediate thought is the woods, a place where I feel free and relaxed. Where I can hunt, the one thing that I enjoy the most. A place that is filled with most of my best memories, when I would laugh and be myself, when Gale and I were still best friends. I can feel the cool air now, the scents of nature around me and the rustling of animals as they creep past. But the woods is no longer my safe haven even the one place I thought would be untouchable has become a playground for my nightmares.

'Well, there is this one place.' I say tentatively

'Go on.' He soothes

I pause for a little while, not sure whether to say what I'm thinking. I'm not embarrassed by it, it's just a very special place to me not something I really want to share. I decide is trustworthy enough.

'Peeta's arms.' I whisper.

'And why is that your 'safe haven' so to speak?'

'It's just a place of such comfort, such warmth and it's always there. No matter what Peeta is always there to hold me, to soothe me, to whisper comforting words into my ear. When I'm in his arms I feel so relaxed, every bad thought just disappears.'

He stays quiet for a moment, drinking in the information.

'So Peeta's your place of comfort, your safe haven?'

'Yes. Yes he is.' I say this with pride and confidence.

'Katniss, next time you have a flashback I want you to go to Peeta, to his arms and just stay there until you feel safe again. And if you can't get to him I want you to imagine you're there, that he's holding you and protecting you from the darkness. I want you to feel his warmth and imagine he's soothing you. Can you do that?'

'Yes, yes I can.'

Peeta. My Peeta. My place of comfort and warmth, my 'light ray in the dark'. I can imagine I'm in his arms so clearly. As I imagine this the strongest feeling of love I have ever felt floods through me, stronger than when we were getting married, and I know that without Peeta I would die.

* * *

After another week I am released from the hospital, my flashbacks do seem to be getting better with or without Peeta. I feel a bit more freedom, a little more happiness in me without having to have something special happen to put it there. It's nice, to feel happy on a daily basis. Peeta and I stayed for a few extra days just so I could catch up with my mother, whose company I had missed more than I thought. I was able to sit with her and discuss my life in 12 and her, her life in 4. We didn't discuss Prim though, it's still too sensitive an area, to painful to recollect. I also visited Annie and Trident, she seemed to be holding up very well. I think having Trident, named in memory of his father and one of his most prized possessions, has helped her to keep going. She had so many stories to tell me but she still had a tendency drift off mid-sentence, floating away into her own world. Young Trident was very like his father with his golden skin and familiar winning smile but he had Annie's jet black hair. He was kind and loving yet very protective over his mother, even at such a young age. Seeing Peeta playing with him was adorable, I can remember the way he would sit in the garden with him just drawing in the dirt or be creating a whole adventure for Trident, a journey through a mysterious world, or a large kingdom that Trident would be ruler of. It brought a smile to my face watching them together; I could see that Peeta enjoyed being able to create a whole new world. For him it meant he knew every last detail, there were no blurred areas of a memory that could be real or not real. Yet it wasn't just the creation of his own worlds that caused him to enjoy spending time with Trident; Peeta just got kids. He loved them because they could bring no evil into this world, only happiness and laughter and Peeta needed that. So it didn't surprise me when one quiet evening a few months later Peeta asked me his one biggest wish.

'Katniss, I want to start a family.'

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**So, what do you think? Peeta's finally popped the question! Sorry for the short chapter but I'm really busy! More to come asap. And _please_ review as, like I said earlier, this helps me to know that you guys like it and do want more. Ideas and constructive criticism are also welcome. :)**

**-Isabel**


	8. I Promise

**Thanks for all the reviews guys, keep them coming they really help me to write! Thankyou shrimp01silva for the suggestion but I'm not very good with grammar, I try my hardest but it still might not be correct. So, anyways here's Chapter 8!**

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Peeta instantly looks guilty flashing me that sheepish smile that causes butterflies in my stomach, I wonder if he knows the effect he has on me. I stay still for a moment, all though these words came as no surprise I still have to think about how I feel towards it.

'I, I don't know if I can do that Peeta.'

The glint in his eyes fades away.

'It's just I'm scared; scared I will turn out to be a bad mother. The flashbacks may be getting better but they are still there, I can't have a child knowing that maybe I'll end up hurting them as a result of what I think is real.'

He still doesn't respond. He just looks down at his hands, his expression unreadable. I close my eyes and continue.

'I'm not strong enough Peeta, that's what I mean. I can barely deal with myself let alone a tiny baby. Having to take care of something so small, so defenseless really terrifies me because if I make one wrong move I'm going to end up damaging it.'

He still does not respond.

'What I'm trying to say is, I'm scared that I'll do something wrong. I just don't think I'm strong enough yet.'

I sit for a little longer waiting for some form of response or movement but nothing comes. It's a long time before he looks up and looks me straight in the eyes. I can see the pain clearly now. I realise just how upset he is by the decision I made, without him.

'Katniss, I've supported you through everything. I never left your side when you were in hospital, I never put any pressure on you incase it was too much. I've always given and never received but now, the thing I've asked you for, want so badly, you can't even consider giving me?'

'Peeta it's just, I'm still not strong enough yet and these flashbacks cause…'

'Do you not think I struggle with flashbacks too?' He's shouting now. 'Do you not think that I still relive the horrors of my past too? Struggle to keep myself from going insane? At least you know what parts of your past are real or not real!'

'I never realised.'

'I never showed you how I was feeling Katniss, ever. I always worried that if you saw that I was struggling you would only become worse. I kept all my feelings inside, for you. But I guess you know now.'

He turns around and storms out of the room, I hear the front door slam. I know there's no point in chasing him, he's too angry now and I understand why. How could I have been so selfish? Ignored everything Peeta was feeling for myself. I have seen bad things, yes but it's nothing compared to what Peeta has been through, torture, the loss of his whole family, his whole past. I put my head in my hands.

'What ever happened to listening to his troubles?' I whisper.

There's no answer. I don't need one; I can see what I have become. That night Peeta doesn't return home. I lie in bed waiting for him my fingers stretched out to where he usually lies, wanting to feel his warmth and stroke his soft hair. At some point I must drift off because I wake up screaming, the sheets twisted around my body, sweat pouring from my forehead. There is no Peeta to comfort me. I lie there for the rest of the night; eyes wide open to keep the nightmares at bay, pushing away the feelings of tiredness threatening to creep over me. When the birds start singing and morning finally arrives I get up and wrap my robe around me, I begin to make my way to the kitchen but somehow I end up standing outside the front door. I realise what I have to do. Apologize, something I am not very well known for. I make my way to the bakery as the morning light begins to break, the sun weakly shining down on me as it begins to wake the world up. I find Peeta inside the bakery, lying by the oven a thin blanket thrown over him. I crouch down beside him and whisper his name, he turns to face me blinking as he begins to wake up.

'Morning.' I say

'Morning.'

'Peeta, I'm sorry about last night. No, I'm sorry about everything. For not being there when you needed me, for not realising that you were in pain, for being so selfish. I'm sorry, sorry for everything.'

'Don't Katniss, it's me that should be sorry. I shouldn't of exploded like that, I…'

'No Peeta. This time it's my turn to be sorry, understand?'

My slightly angry tone makes Peeta laugh.

'That's my Katniss.'

I smile. 'Now come on, let's get you some breakfast. I'm making.'

'Sounds good to me.'

We walk out of the bakery and Peeta takes my hand.

'Katniss.'

'Yes?' I turn to face him.

'We don't have to have children, not if you don't want to.'

'I do Peeta, just not yet. I need some time.'

He's smiling now as he realises that one day we will have a family.

'Take as long as you need.'

He leans in and kisses me. My whole stomach flips now and my heart beat quickens considerably. As I pull away I whisper.

'Just promise me we'll never argue again.'

He whispers back. 'I promise.'

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**I'm sorry, I know it's such a short chapter but I hope you liked it all the same. There won't be an update tomorrow as I'm too busy but there will be one Friday so stay tuned! Please review as like I said they help keep me writing! :)**

**-Isabel**


	9. A Phone Call

**Here's the 9th chapter. There will be more tomorrow as it's the weekend, yaay! I would like to thank okiegirl14 for her review, saying my writing is like Suzanne Collins. WOW! What a complement! So here's the chapter, enjoy and please review.**

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It's a couple of months after mine and Peeta's argument that we receive a phone call from Paylor. Peeta picked up the phone that night; I was sat in the living room and went through to see who he was talking to.

'Yes, I see. A celebration. Well, I'll ask Katniss and get back to you. I can't guarantee a yes but I'll try and convince her.' He gives me a little smile and I roll my eyes. 'All right, nice hearing from you. Maybe I'll see you in a week. Bye.'

'Who was that?' I ask

'Paylor. He wants us to visit the Capitol next week to celebrate Victory Day.'

'Victory Day, what's that?' I'm confused now.

'The day the rebels defeated the Capitol. They want you there as a special guest, to continue the Mockingjay legacy.'

I'm slightly taken aback by the news. I thought that when the war had ended my role as Mockingjay had too. I take a moment to digest the information. Finally, the answer is in my head and I know it's the right one.

'I'll do it.'

'You will?' Peeta looks shocked.

'I will. I'll go and celebrate the day we defeated the old Capitol.' I pause. 'And Snow. I have to face my demons sooner or later Peeta and I pick sooner.'

I feel confident as I say these words. Peeta's eyes shine with a look of hope. He walks and over and engulfs me in a hug.

'That's my old Katniss.' He says.

And I know that it is.

* * *

**The Capitol**

We left bright and early for the train the following Tuesday, it would take us 2 days of traveling before we reached the Capitol in time for Friday's celebrations. I felt ready, I wanted to celebrate the day we had triumphed over the old Capitol and rid Panem of Snow. Peeta was excited too, I could see it in his eyes. I guess we were both glad to be a part of something that had restored peace and equality in Panem but we were most proud of the fact that we had started it. The 2 days on the train raced by and on Wednesday evening we were pulling into the Capitol. I stood by the window taking it in, every time the city still took my breath away, the huge polished marble buildings standing proudly above you, the wide streets stretching out in front of you. Even in the 'updated' District 12 you saw nothing like this. As Peeta and I stepped off the train a huge crowd began to swarm around us, cheering and calling our names. The armed guards either side of us kept most of the crowd at bay but I was still able to see the excitement on all their faces. I guess they have missed the star-crossed lovers of District 12. We are lead into a car which whisks us away to the Capitol Government Building, once inside Peeta and I are greeted by Paylor and an ecstatic Plutarch.

'How nice of you to attend.' Paylor says shaking my hand.

'I'm glad to be a part of this.' I respond.

'How nice indeed.' Says Plutarch rather enthusiastically.

He turns to Peeta.

'And how are you my boy?'

'Fantastic. Katniss and I are officially married.' He smiles broadly and I do too.

'Congratulations!' Paylor embraces us both.

'What? When? And why didn't you tell us? We could've televised it!' Plutarch cries.

'The whole of Panem thought we were married, you couldn't of televised it otherwise they would all realise it was fake.' I snap. 'Besides, we wanted it to be private and special. No camera's in our faces.'

'Yes, well, I had forgotten about that. But you'll have to deal with camera's whilst you're here.' Plutarch mumbles.

'Oh, I'm fine with that.' I respond coolly. I still haven't forgiven Plutarch.

'Let's have someone show you to your room.' Paylor breaks the silence.

Two men come forwards and take our bags away.

'I'll come with you. I need to run over some things with you anyway.'

We follow Paylor to the elevators and enter an open one.

'You're floor 4, room 406.'

She says pressing the button.

'Plutarch forgot to mention; you have an interview with our new host Jacabel Stevenson at 9. Katniss, your prep team is waiting for you in your room. They're going to do both of you.'

'Is there anything you want us to say in the interview?' Peeta asks.

'No, keep it natural. I don't want it to seem staged any important announcements will happen tomorrow on Victory Day.'

The doors open and we step out onto the floor. Paylor hands us our key and shows us to our room.

'I'll see you at 10 for the pre-celebration dinner.'

She smiles and walks away. We open the door of our room to the welcoming squeals of my prep team. They sit us down and begin to get to work, grooming us to perfection as they fill me in on all the details of their lives. I sit back and take it all in.

* * *

**The Interview**

I am all ready to go on stage, my dark hair has been braided the way my mother does it and my eyes covered in a fine glitter. I'm wearing a silvery white dress with a small v-neck and floats down to my knees, when I spin it flows out around me.

'Are you ready Katniss?' Jacabel asks.

I nod, nerves creeping over me. I have no idea what happened to Cesar but I hope he's ok, that the new government spared his life. We are beckoned to a loveseat next to Jacabel's chair and the lights turn on.

'Welcome to the Jacabel Stevenson Show!' A tannoy booms.

There's a polite round of applause from the audience, I guess Jacabel it still new but I have the feeling that hewill never be able to outshine Cesar.

'Welcome audience and viewers!' Jacabel beams. 'My two guests today are, and you know them very well, the star-crossed lovers Katniss and Peeta!'

There's a tumultuous round of applause as Peeta and I stand up and wave. Once the audience has calmed we sit back down again and begin the interview.

'So, what a journey you two have been on together.' Jacabel says.

'Yes, quite a journey.' Says Peeta. 'Full of ups and downs but I feel that overall it has brought us closer.'

'I agree, I feel that this journey has helped me to discover my true love for Peeta.'

The Capitol audience let out a series of 'oooh's' and 'aaah's'.

'I wanted to ask, how did you feel when you both went into the Quarter Quell?'

I take a breath and begin to say how I really felt the day I found we were both going back into the Games.

'I was terrified but the one thing I knew I had to do was keep Peeta alive, I couldn't face the idea of him not making it.'

I stare down at my hands.

'I felt the same way, I had to keep Katniss alive. She had so much to live for and without her I couldn't go on. I just couldn't be without her.'

I remember Peeta saying this to me on the beach in the Quarter Quell and I feel tears pricking my eyes.

'And then, you two were separated. How did you feel?" Jacabel soothes.

'I was lost without Peeta, he was the only thing on my mind all day every day. I missed him so much. It was like a huge part of me was missing.'

Peeta says nothing. His face has gone blank. His memories after the Quarter Quell are too painful to recount freely.

'Well,' Says Jacabel getting the message. 'We can't wait to be joined by Katniss, Peeta and Gales at tomorrow's Victory Day celebrations!'

I barely hear the final round of applause. The light's turn off but all I can think about is Gale. Gale is here and I'm going to have to face him soon.

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**Hope you enjoyed the chapter. It changed scenes a couple of times but I thought that kept it interesting. Little bit of a cliffhanger, eh? Anyway, please review they really inspire my writing and I'm glad to see I'm giving the emotional experience to some people! :)**

**-Isabel**


	10. Apologies

**So, we've found out the Gale will be attending the pre-celebration dinner. But what is Katniss going to do? to say? Please review guys, I love reading them and they make me to want to write MORE of this story. I want to try and reach _40_ reviews before I post the next chapter so review, review, review and enjoy!  
**

* * *

'Katniss?'

Peeta's concerned voice fills my ears. I shake my head, rousing myself from the shock.

'Yes. I'm ok, it's just, I didn't know Gale was going to be here.'

Peeta looks confused. Of course, I never told him about the argument Gale and I had.

'Before the wedding Gale and I had an argument. I walked out and haven't spoken to him since.' I mumble.

'Did he hurt you?' Peeta's voice is filled with anger.

'Yes. Well, not physically but he said some things that hurt.'

'Why didn't you tell me Katniss?'

'I was going to but I didn't want to ruin our special day and then I guess I just forgot about it completely. I'm sorry.'

'You have nothing to be sorry for Katniss.' Peeta soothes. His next words are filled with anger. 'But when I see Gale, I'm going to kill him.'

I smile weakly. 'Don't do that Peeta.'

He kneels down to my eye level. I stare back into those crystal blue eyes, I remember when those eyes contained only happiness and love. Now I notice the sadness in them, the pain that will never fully leave.

'Katniss, I promised I would never let anyone hurt you. Gale included.'

I take his outstretched hand and stand up. He wraps his arms around me and I hold him back, I nestle my head into his neck.

'I love you Peeta Mellark.'

'I love you too Katniss Mellark.'

I smile at this. I am married to such a wonderful man who will do anything to ensure I am happy, to protect me. It is moments like this that I realise how much I love Peeta. The fire inside me starts up as I kiss Peeta slowly, passionately. I wish this moment could go on forever but a voice interrupts us.

'Oh for god's sake. Enough of this mush, we have a dinner to attend.'

* * *

**A Surprise**

My head snaps around. I am shocked by who I see.

'Johanna!'

'Who's she?' Johanna laughs.

She walks over and gives me a hug. I'm slightly taken aback by this large gesture; Johanna's a very basic person when it comes to showing emotions.

'What are you doing here?' I gasp.

'Did you not hear what I said?' She rolls her eyes at my confused expression. 'I'm here for the dinner.'

I slap my hand to my forehead, of course she is. I guess the shock of seeing her had wiped that thought from my mind. She laughs again and plants a kiss on Peeta's cheek, he pulls her into a hug. Peeta and Johanna share the same nightmares; it's no surprise that they are close.

'How have you been?' He asks holding her out and looking her up and down. 'You look fantastic.'

A slight feeling of jealousy stirs in me but I quickly brush it away remembering that last time he saw she had no hair and was covered in purple bruises and fresh gashes.

'I've been taking care of myself.' She smiles. 'And I've found myself a soul mate.'

She holds out her hand to a young man standing nearby, he's tall with broad shoulders. His vibrant green eyes stand out against his tanned skin. He runs a hand through his red hair and walks over.

'Cedar, meet Katniss and Peeta.'

He shakes our hands flashing a bright smile.

'Pleased to meet you.' He says.

'You too.' I reply.

'Hello! What's this?' Johanna says lifting up my hand. She's noticed my wedding band.

'Oh, Peeta and I got married.'

'And I wasn't told?' Johanna exclaims.

I immediately feel guilty.

'I'm sorry, I completely forgot, I just…'

Johanna begins to laugh again. '

It's alright, I can't deal with any of that fluffy wedding stuff anyway. Probably best that I kept away, although I don't mind a good party.'

I blush, I'm so embarrassed. How could I forget Johanna? I stand there awkwardly.

'We should probably get to the dinner.' Cedar interrupts. 'Don't want to be late.'

'Right, yes.' I say flustered. 'Paylor will be annoyed if we are.'

Johanna takes Cedar's hand and walks away, still laughing.

'I'm so glad she found him.' Peeta says. 'He's obviously helped her to recover, a lot.'

I nod. 'I never thought she would get any better but look at her now.'

Peeta takes my hand and gives it a reassuring squeeze.

'Let's go.'

* * *

**The Dinner  
**

The pre-celebration dinner is packed with people, I recognise the occasional face. Annie, Haymitch, Beetee (I'm glad to see he's well) but no Gale. I search the crowd for him, craning my neck to see over the heads.

'Katniss!' Squeals a voice from behind me.

I turn around. 'Effie!'

She runs forward and gives me a hug.

'I haven't seen you since the wedding. Which, by the way, was absolutely perfect. Those vows, I cried so much I had to redo all my make-up!'

Her hand flies to her chest as she tells me this. I have missed this woman's enthusiasm.

'I'm glad you enjoyed it Effie, it was so nice of you to come especially all the way from the Capitol. Thank you.'

'Oh, not at all.'

She smiles at my manners, something very dear to Effie. Paylor's voice interrupts us.

'Ladies and Gentlemen, if you could please take your seats then the dinner can commence!'

There's a great movement of people towards the long table. Peeta and I find our seats; we are right beside Paylor, who is at the head of the table, and sit down. One seat across from us remains empty. Gale's. I wonder if he's coming or if the fact that I'm here kept him away. When the first course is over and all the plates have been removed a man comes in and whispers something to Paylor, she nods her head and brushes him away. She stands up.

'We have just been informed that our final guest has arrived. '

The doors open and in steps Gale.

'Sorry I'm late everyone.' He says and takes his seat.

After a small awkward pause people begin to talk again and the dinner continues. The rest of the night I am a nervous wreck, I try and focus on the wonderful food we are eating but all I can think about is how I am going to have to talk to Gale. I finally get my opportunity when the dinner has ended and the dance floor opened. As people begin to leave the dining area Gale approaches me.

'Katniss, I need to talk to you.'

Peeta stiffens, protectively wrapping his arm around my waist.

'Anything you have to say to her, you can say to me.' He says through gritted teeth.

'No, it's all right Peeta. I need to talk Gale. You go on and have fun.' I reply.

'I'll be right here if you need me.' He grumbles. 'You watch out Hawthorne because if you hurt her I'm not going to go easy on you.'

I notice his body is quivering slightly. I rest my hand on his shoulder.

'I'll be alright, I promise.'

He relaxes slightly and I give him a quick kiss before leading Gale out of the dining room. I turn to Gale.

'Katniss, I'm sorry.'

I can see he means it.

'I am too Gale.'

'No, really Katniss. What I said, it wasn't right. I was just jealous and spiteful; I should never have said any of those things. I know you never gave up on me, you never will and I'll never give up on you, even if you are married to Mellark. I'll always love you Katniss but I can see how happy he makes you and I guess..' He takes a breath. 'I love you enough to let you go.'

His last words linger in the air. I step forwards.

'I love you too Gale but not in the same way I love Peeta. Your more like a brother to me whereas with Peeta I feel so at peace, so safe. I really do love him, I'll always love you and I'll never give you up but you have to understand that he's a part of my life. A part I can't let go. But thank you Gale, thank you for being able to see how happy he makes me and thank you for accepting everything.'

He pulls me into a hug, I'm dwarfed by his tall body.

'I missed you.' I mumble into his chest.

'I've missed you too Catnip.'

* * *

**Aww, So Gale and Katniss have finally made up and Gale's decided to accept Katniss' love for Peeta, how sweet! Hope you guys liked it please review! And remember I want to try and reach _40 reviews _before I release the next chapter. I love you guys, thank you SO, SO, SO much for all your fantastic support! I really love writing for you all. Much love,  
**

**-Isabel :)**


	11. New Beginnings

**Sooo, I know that I said no chapter until 40 reviews but I had such a good idea for this chapter and I couldn't wait to share it with you! Just a quick note, I'm sorry I use ' instead of " for when people are speaking but its quicker for me to type with ' instead of having to press shift to get ", I am sorry and I know it's bad grammar but it's just easier for me. So, anyway, here's the chapter. Enjoy! :)**

* * *

When I find Peeta again I am quick to reassure him that everything was sorted, I could not deal with any full fist brawls tonight. He seemed to relax a bit and we danced the rest of the night away. He even allowed me to dance with Gale, although he kept a close eye on both of us. I ended up having a fantastic night, second only to my wedding. Early next morning we were woken up by Effie knocking on our door.

'It's going to be a big, big, big day.' She calls.

I smile at Effie's trademark line. Peeta rolls over to face me.

'Better get up or else we'll see Effie's bad side.'

I start laughing. We both know Effie has no bad side.

'5 more minutes.' I say ducking my head under the covers.

'Katniss Mellark, you better come out from under there or I'll have to force you out.' Peeta teases.

'And how will you do that?' I ask.

'By tickling you.'

'Nooo!' I cry.

It's too late; Peeta's under the covers and has got a hold of me.

'Peeta, no, stop!' I squeal. 'Don't, you know, ahh! Stop, I can't, Peetaaa!'

I roll around trying to get away from his fingers.

'Ok, ok. I'm coming out I'm coming.' I say through breaths.

He's laughing as he holds me in his arms. I push him off and jump on top of him.

'I am so going to get you back for that.'

He grins and I can't help but plant a kiss on his lips. He rolls me over and I'm now underneath him. I stare into his bright blue eyes as they get closer to me. He kisses my nose, then my lips and then my neck. I sigh, relaxing at his touch. He continues to move down my neck.

'Peeta stop, not now.'

'Stop what?' He asks with mock innocence.

I roll my eyes and smile. I pin him down, my hands pressed against his shoulders.

'Come on mister, we need to get ready.'

I lean in to kiss him but pull away.

'Just kidding.' I giggle running into the bathroom.

'Come here you!'

I hear Peeta running after me. He grabs me from behind and spins me around. I wrap my arms around his neck as he lowers his head. I reach up and place my lips to his. The fire starts up inside me.

* * *

**The Speech  
**

It's early afternoon and Peeta, Gale and I are all stood inside the government building getting ready for our balcony appearance. Plutarch approaches us.

'We're going to televise your appearance for the whole of Panem to see. Do you mind doing a little speech Katniss? We've got cards for you to read off of so don't worry.' I give a curt nod. 'Great, are you ready then?'

We all nod our heads and follow him out onto the balcony; the applause is tumultuous. People are cheering our names, holding out their hands. We take our places behind Paylor and she raises her hand, silence falls.

'Welcome. Welcome everybody to the very first Victory Day!'

People begin to clap and cheer, Paylor raises her hand again.

'As you all know today we celebrate the day when the rebels defeated the old Capitol and it's ruler President Snow. To remember those who fought and those who died for the freedom of us all. And to mark a new beginning we have decided to change Panem's name.'

There are shocked whispers through the crowd; I must admit I am also shocked. I knew nothing of this and judging by Peeta and Gale's expressions, neither did they. Paylor continues.

'We have decided to rename Panem, Libero. Libero means freedom in the old language of Latin. Every member of this country deserves freedom and a right to express your opinion that is why we have changed the name. So, Happy Victory Day! Enjoy this celebration of our freedom!'

There's a shocked silence before the applause starts up again, this time it's deafening. Paylor turns to me smiling.

'Your turn.' She says.

Well I guess this is what she says, I can't hear her over the noise. I step up to the microphone, although I have prompt cards I am still nervous. People begin to stop clapping as they realise I am about to speak. Gradually, the courtyard becomes quiet. I take a breath and close my eyes. I stay quiet for a second. I open my eyes again. I know what to say. I don't need the cards.

'Three years ago my life changed. I was thrown into a whole new environment, one where I had slim chances of survival. But somehow, even I am unsure how, I survived. But it wasn't just me. A young boy lived too. I never knew how much that young boy would change my life. That he would become my husband. My whole world. Without him I could not have continued on fighting, being your Mockingjay. Without his constant support, his undying love for me I would've given up. Yet there was another special boy in my life, one who knew me like the back of his hand. He is my best friend, my brother. Without him too, I would not have kept going. I nearly lost one of them and nearly lost myself because of it. But my best friend picked me up, helped me to stand on my feet again. With his help I began to realise that if I won this war, brought peace to the country that was then Panem, I could bring back the one I loved so much. I lost people who I can never replace in that war. I miss them dearly but these two fill that void, keep hope alive. I may have been your Mockingjay but I never stood alone.'

I grab Peeta and Gale's hands and hold them high above our heads. The crowd below goes wild. The star crossed lovers of District 12, the cause of the rebellion that has brought peace to Libero, living a happy life together is one reason for them to clap and cheer but the whole new twist to the tale everyone thought they knew so well adds more reason. Another figure of hope in the life of the Mockingjay.

* * *

**Home****  
**

A week later Peeta and I are back in District 12. After a week of making public appearances and partying until the early hours of the morning we are both exhausted. Now we are both sat in our living room, the fire blazing in front of us. Peeta is painting, probably the fire. He likes the orange colour's says they remind him of a fierce sunset, one that brings a whole new beginning. I just stare at him, his brow furrowed in concentration, his blonde hair falling over his forehead, his hand moving rhythmically over the canvas. That's when I realise that I want to start a new beginning, Peeta's and my new beginning.

'I'll do it.' I say.

'Do what?' Peeta looks up, confused.

'I'll have children.'

* * *

**I hope you liked the cliffhanger! Katniss and Peeta are finally going to have children! So, I need your help with baby names. Write your name suggestion in a review or PM me and if I find one I like, I'll choose it. I have decided that the next chapter will NOT be released until _40 reviews_. So keep reviewing! They really inspire and make me want to write more because I know you are enjoying the story. Stay safe! Love you all,**

**-Isabel :)  
**


	12. Good News

**So, Katniss has agreed to have children so as you've probably guessed this chapter is a little more, ummm, sexual? :P So please, only 13+ to read. A _huge_, _huge_, _HUGE_ thank you to all you guys. Not only did you get me to reach my goal of 40 but you got me to 50! Thank you all, I love you all so much! Enjoy the chapter! :D**

* * *

'What?' Peeta stands up the shock evident on his face.

'I'll do it Peeta, I'll have children.'

The biggest smile I have ever seen breaks across Peeta's face. He runs forwards and grabs my hands.

'You will?'

I nod. 'Yes.'

'Katniss, you've made me the happiest man alive.'

Peeta grabs me and lifts me up, swinging me around. I squeal and hold him tightly. I have never seen him like this, not even the day when I told him I really loved him.

'I have?'

He places me on the ground and holds my head in his hands, looking directly into my eyes.

'Yes.' He leans in and kisses me passionately. 'I love you.'

'I love you too.' I whisper back.

He leans in and kisses me again, softly, slowly. I kiss him back. A tingling feeling starts in my toes and slowly spreads its way up my body, right up to my heart. He lifts me off my feet again and carries me up the stairs; I guess he wants to get started on having a baby. He lays me down on the bed, slipping my dress up over my head. I begin to unbutton his shirt, my lips still pressed to his. I begin to feel that desire that need for him that only comes to me when we are so close, so intimate. I hold him in my arms, absorbing his warmth, taking in his smell of freshly baked bread and burnt wood. He is so close yet I have never wanted him so much. He kisses my neck and I drop my head back, closing my eyes. What is it about him kissing my neck that just gets me? I breathe out, a soft moan escaping my lips. Our bodies move together now, the heat rising, chemistry building. We are one Peeta and I. Together in a moment filled not just with pleasure but our deep, passionate love for each other. Our love that binds us together.

* * *

**The Morning After  
**

I wake up the next morning to sunlight streaming through the window; the mockingjay's outside singing a happy melody. I remember the night before with a smile, I have never craved Peeta so much. I look down at my stomach, my finger tracing invisible lines over it. I wonder if there is a life beginning to grow in there, a life that Peeta and I created. A hand rests next to mine. I roll over to face Peeta, his crystal blue eyes smiling at me.

'Good morning.' I say, gently kissing him.

'Good morning darling.'

I smile at this. Peeta has never called me darling before.

'I like that.'

'What?'

'You calling me darling.'

I roll over on top of him, resting my chin on his chest. We just look at each other for a moment, drinking everything in.

'Remind me to ask for children more often.' Peeta jokes.

I laugh. 'Well, if you enjoyed it that much I'll only make it for special occasions.'

'Don't do that, you're too irresistible.'

He brushes a stray strand of hair out of my eyes. I grab his hand and rest it against my cheek. I close my eyes as Peeta kisses me. The moment seems to go all too quickly.

'Come on darling let's get some breakfast.' He says, breaking away.

He takes my hand and pulls me out of bed. I grab my robe, wrapping it around my bare skin. I follow him out of the room and downstairs, I stop in the sitting room and just stand there. This is where it started, where mine and Peeta's new beginning began.

* * *

**The News  
**

Six week's later I get the tell-tale sign that means I'm pregnant. I'm hurrying along the snowy road to the bakery, barely able to contain my excitement. I burst through the door and head into the back. Peeta's busy icing a cake, his tongue poking out the side of his mouth in concentration. When he hears me he turns around, a worried look spreads over his face, he thinks I'm here to tell him something bad has happened.

'I'm pregnant.' I say the words with relish.

'What?' Peeta's worried expression turns to shock, then pure joy.

I step forward and take his hands in mine.

'You're going to be a father!'

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed it! I tried to keep it as calm as possible without being too boring, I hope I did well! Sorry for the short chapter but I've been revising _all_ day. Again, a MASSIVE thank you to everybody who reviewed and got me past 40 to _50_! I probably won't post until Friday because I have exams all week and I _have_ to revise, really sorry. Thanks for being so good to me. I love you all,**

**-Isabel :)**

**P.S Any baby name ideas? Thanks to ilikebread1 for all the helpful PM's! :3  
**


	13. Together

**So, I know I said no posts until Friday but I managed to squeeze some writing time in. Thanks to NightLock-THG for pushing me to do this chapter, I was going to do it eventually but I kept thinking up other ideas. Now seemed like the perfect time to write this, enjoy!**

* * *

I'm 18 weeks along now and I'm beginning to show. Peeta's as excited as ever; every day he's smiling, whistling, laughing. He's back, the old Peeta. The boy with the bread. That's one of the best things about being pregnant, bringing Peeta back of the darkness. I only wish the same could be said for me but I'm struggling, the morning sickness, the constant mood swings. The worst times are the days where I can't even pull myself out of bed. I just lie there in the darkness, eyes closed, head throbbing, body numb until Peeta comes along and forces food and water in me. Not that it stays there. I make up for them by being extra happy the next day, laughing, smiling, dancing around the room. Sometimes he notices.

'It's alright Katniss.' He says. 'You don't have to be happy all the time, your pregnant, I understand.'

He'll always kiss me after he says those words and I always instantly feel better, so that I really do end up dancing around the room. I love when this happens. When every problem I've ever had just disappears, lost in the perfection of the moment. But tonight, tonight is one of the worst mood swings I've ever had. I'm lying in bed, the covers pulled over my head and the curtains pulled tight shut. I've been here for about two hours when Peeta arrives back from the bakery.

'Come on, we have to get some food in you.'

'No. I'll only throw it up again.' I protest.

'At least, drink some water.' He pleads.

I pull myself out of bed.

'Only for you. Just make sure the goddamn kitchen's dark.'

He smiles and runs downstairs.

'It's ready.' He calls.

I thump my way down the stairs, one never-ending step at a time. I enter the kitchen and immediately gag.

'Whatever that smell is, get rid of it.' I groan.

'There's no smell darling, I think its just part of your pregnancy.'

'There's a smell Peeta. Now get rid of it!' I snap.

He looks confused.

'I'll just move into the sitting room.'

I shuffle out of the kitchen and collapse on the sofa. I curl up in a ball, clutching my head in my hands. Peeta comes in a glass of water in his hand, a sheepish smile on his face.

'I'm sorry.'

'No, I'm sorry. It's just the hormones, they drive me crazy.' I sigh.

'How about a cuddle?'

I nod my head. 'That'd be nice.'

He lies down beside me, resting his head on my shoulder.

'Did I ever tell you how much I love you?'

'Yes.'

'Well, I love you so much. Do you know why?'

This time I shake my head.

'Well, once upon a time I saw the most beautiful girl, with the most beautiful voice. So beautiful the birds stopped to listen. I loved this girl in secret until one day I finally told her. I thought I would die you see, so I decided she had to know before I was gone. I didn't die, she kept me alive. Nearly killed herself for me. Just as our lives were beginning to become clear again, we were thrown back into a life or death situation. We stayed together, right until one point where I left her. I have never regretted anything so much; I should never have left her. I nearly lost her, not just physically but mentally. But there was one night when she told me my favorite colour; Orange, soft like the sunset, and other pieces of my life that I had forgotten. The one most important thing that I had forgotten came back to me, her. When I nearly lost her, that's when I really remembered how much I loved her. One day, she finally told me she loved me. And I love her with every fibre of my being. She makes me so happy, the best thing that has ever happened to me.'

I realise I am crying, silent tears spilling out of my eyes and rolling down my cheeks.

'I'm so sorry Peeta.' I whisper.

'Why?'

'For breaking your heart., for destroying you. If I'd just shown you how I really felt about you then maybe, maybe the Capitol wouldn't of destroyed you so much. You wouldn't of given in, been able to fight back, define real from not real.'

'Shushh.' He soothes me. 'It was never your fault Katniss. Ever. I want you to know that. The way they tortured me, I'm surprised I didn't die. I think maybe, subconsciously you were always there. I don't think I ever really forgot you.'

We sit in silence for a moment before he speaks again.

'You always loved me?'

'Yes. Ever since one particular kiss in the cave. I felt this feeling.'

He nods his head. 'I know that one well.'

'I was sacred. That's why I never told you. I always saw myself as strong and independent and I didn't know how to go about needing someone else. I wasn't used to it. I'm sorry.' I say through sobs.

'You have nothing to be sorry for. The past is the past. We're together now, about to start a wonderful family and that's all that matters.'

'I love you Peeta.'

'I love you too Katniss Mellark.'

'Will we always be together?' I ask.

'Always.'

These are the last words I hear before sleep overcomes me, Peeta's arms still wrapped around me, our understanding of how deep each other's love for one another really is. The past is the past and here comes our future, it will be happy and bright and filled with our love. Not just for each other but for our children, our family. Our love that kept us both alive in the darkest of times. Our love that will keep us together for the rest of our lives.

* * *

**I cried whilst writing this chapter, I got so into it! I felt everything Katniss and Peeta wanted to say and tears just started to fall. I hope you enjoyed it and felt the emotions as much as I did. I won't be posting until Friday because I have huge exams coming up that will probably take up all my time. I'm going to post the next chapter when I have _70_ reviews, so please review. I love reading them and they inspire me and keep me writing. Thank you all for your on going support! Much love,**

**-Isabel :)**


	14. Boy or Girl?

**I got 70 reviews, thank you sosososo much! I love you guys! Here it is, finally, the 14th chapter. Sorry for the wait! So, Peeta and Katniss have finally addressed their past and now it's time to start their future. Enjoy!**

* * *

The next morning I wake up with Peeta's arms still wrapped tightly around me. Last night Peeta and I finally spoke about our past, the way we felt. The pain of what I did to him has finally been relieved, he now knows that I always loved him and it's restored peace in him. The dark cloud hanging over us has finally cleared, allowing the light to shine back into our world. Were stronger now, Peeta and I, our future together has begun.

* * *

**The Kick  
**

Two weeks later and my stomach is beginning to bulge out a little, the excess weight from the past few weeks slowly stretching to become the bump I now run my hands over. I can't believe there's life in me, right there underneath my hand.

'Excited?'

Peeta's voice behind makes me jump. I turn to see him standing in the doorway, arms folded a big smile on his face.

'Yes.'

Today we find out the gender of the baby. Part of me is nervous but I'm not sure why because I've had an ultrasound before. Maybe it's just the excitement of finally knowing what I am carrying.

'Boy or girl?' Peeta asks.

'I'm not sure, I haven't really thought about it.' I answer.

'I hope it's a girl because she'll be perfect, like you.'

I roll my eyes.

'You can be so cheesy.'

But I reach up and give him a kiss anyway. I pull away and stare into the mirror again, my hands moving over the small bump.

'Oh!' I cry.

'What? What is it?' Peeta's instantly by my side.

'The baby just kicked!'

'Here.' I take his hand, placing it over the bump.

His face lights up. 'I feel it Katniss, I feel it!'

He's laughing now as he pulls me in for a hug. I look up at him, his eyes bright with excitement.

'There it is Katniss, our little baby.'

* * *

**Boy or Girl?  
**

I'm sat on the chair nervously twiddling my thumbs as we wait for the doctor to come in. Peeta places his hand on my shoulder.

'Darling, it's ok. You've done this before.'

'I know, I know. I can't help but feel nervous, I'm not sure why.'

'Soon we'll know.' He smiles and I can't help but smile back.

The doctor walks in behind me.

'Good afternoon Mr and Mrs Mellark.' She greets.

'Good afternoon.' Peeta and I chorus.

'So today we find out the baby's sex.'

'Yes.' I whisper back.

Peeta takes my hand and gives it a reassuring squeeze.

'Ok.' Dr Rogers says. 'So, as you know the gel will be a little cold.'

She squeezes the gel onto my stomach, I wince slightly. The ultrasound appears on television and there it is. Our baby.

'So, there's the head.'

She points to the screen and I nod.

'And there's the heart, can you see it beating?'

'Oh my goodness, yes!' I exclaim.

There it is, the methodic beating of our little baby's heart. Peeta's smile grows wider as he stares at the ultrasound.

'Ah! And it's a girl.'

Peeta's full on beaming now and tears begin to form in my eyes.

'It's a girl Peeta, we're having a girl.' Tears are really falling now.

'Oh Katniss, it's just what I wanted.'

He pulls me in for a huge hug and I notice the slight glassiness in his eyes. I'm so glad to have been able to give Peeta what he wanted, make him even more happier. I've let him down a lot recently and to finally be able to give him something to smile about makes me cry even more.

'What's wrong Katniss?' He says, pushing my hair off my face.

'Nothing. I'm just so happy.' I reply, barely audible through the tears.

'I'm glad to see such a happy couple, who are going to be two wonderful parents.'

I almost forgot was here too.

'Thankyou.' I say. 'That means a lot.'

'Glad to be of help.' She smiles. 'See you in 2 weeks for a check-up.'

She leaves the room and I collect my things. We walk out of the doctor's to bright sunshine and the songs of the mockingjay's surrounding us.

'It's so beautiful.'

I admire the bright blue sky, vibrant green grass and warm glow of the sun surrounding us. Peeta takes my face in his hands and kisses me. He pulls away and looks me in the eyes.

'Katniss, when you smile the whole world smiles with you.'

* * *

**Sorry it's really short but I'm tired after a week of exams but I wanted to post as I felt guilty for leaving you guys for a couple of days. This is basically a little 'filler' chapter until I post a longer one tomorrow. I got 70 reviews! THANK YOU SO MUCH! You are all so good to me! Now I aim for _85_ reviews, will you guys help me? Pretty please :3. I also want to say a qucik thanks to OnlyMe9 for being so understanding about my exams but they're done now! Whoooo! I'm free to write again! Thank you all for supporting me, more soon! Much love,**

**-Isabel :)**


	15. Peeta's Nightmares

**So we found out it's a little girl! I need help with names! I was thinking maybe Hazel or Harmony? But let me know your ideas. Anyway here's Chapter.15, it's a long one. Thank you for getting me to 85 reviews, honestly all your support is amazing. Thank you so much, I love you all! Anyway, Enjoy!**

* * *

I look up at Peeta as we sit in our usual seats, the fire blazing beside us. I study his features, his soft blonde hair, those vibrant blue eyes and his mouth that's always ready to smile. But it's not the way he looks that I love; it's the huge volume of compassion within him, his ability to always see good despite the pain he's been through. That is why I love the boy with the bread so much. I don't even realise what I've said until the word's tumble out of my mouth.

'Peeta, what did they do to you?'

He looks up from his canvas and I see the look of shock as he registers what I have just asked. My hand flies to my mouth.

'I'm so sorry, I don't know what...God, why did I say that?'

I throw my head into my hands and squeeze my eyes shut. I'm such an idiot, how could I ask Peeta such a sensitive question?

'It's alright Katniss. If we want to start a whole new future we have to face the past.'

'Peeta, don't worry. It was just a stupid question.'

'No. You should know.'

He goes silent for a while and just stares at the ground. I suppose it's hard to find somewhere to start when the memory might not be real. He finally speaks up, his voice barely audible.

'They kept me in a tiny cell. It was pitch black, the type of black where your eyes never adjusted. There was nothing in there. Nothing to comfort me except the smell of my own blood and Johanna's screams.'

I take in a breath, I'm not sure if I want to hear this. But I'm his wife and I stay beside him for better or for worse.

'At first, they just beat me up. Every time I refused to give them the information, they kicked me, punched me, dislocated my shoulders, slammed my head against the wall and strangled me to the point where I was nearly dead. It never stopped. They were always there, always ready to hurt me some more.'

I notice his eyes are becoming dilated so I push myself out of my chair and grab his hands whilst I kneel below him.

'You can stop, you don't have to go any further.' Slight pleading enters my voice.

'No. I'm facing the past.' He grits his teeth. 'I never told them anything. Ever. So then they started telling me that they had you, that they were going to kill you. I guess they had Jabberjays because they would play me your screams. You begging for mercy, calling for me to help you. I believed those screams were real. I would beg them not to hurt you but they wanted was information in return for your safety. But what could I give them though? I knew nothing. So they continued to 'torture' you and I would have to listen, trying desperately to protect you by feeding them whatever I could that wouldn't cause you any pain because that's what you and I do, protect each other.'

I remember saying those exact words to him, after we'd saved him. When everything he'd ever known, he no longer knew.

'They realised this pretty quickly so they changed tactics. That's when they started injecting the tracker jacker poison. They'd sit me down in front of this huge screen and force me to watch these videos of you trying to kill me during the first games, of you setting tracker jackers on me, of you blowing up a hospital in eight, of you killing my family. I tried Katniss, I tried to hold on. To remind myself that that wasn't you. But the venom, it over came me and soon those videos became my reality. I believed them; I really thought you wanted me dead, that you had killed my family. That's why I wanted you dead. I blamed you for everything, I hated you. I tried to kill you. I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry.'

He's crying now. Tears start rolling down his cheeks and his shoulders shake with the sobs.

'Peeta, peeta?' I squeeze his hand. 'Peeta look at me.' His eyes flicker towards mine. 'It was never your fault, I want you to know that. What they did to you, it's no surprise you acted the way you did. I'm surprised you didn't end up dead. You fought them Peeta until you could finally fight no more. It's not your fault, it's not your fault.'

My voice trails off. I lean on the chair, pulling myself off the floor. I grab his face in my hands.

'It's not your fault.'

There's a more purposeful tone in my voice now and he looks up at me, those blue eyes shining with tears.

'I just wish I could remember.' He whispers.

'Remember what?' I ask.

'Remember those moments we shared together before the Capitol got me. What we had before I forgot it all.'

'In the first games, you declared you love for me. You know that?'

He nods. 'You saved my life.'

'And you saved mine.'

'How?' He seems confused.

'By loving me.' I answer.

He just nods his head again. I continue.

'You really loved me Peeta, you did everything you could to keep me alive. Even teaming up with the careers. I loved you, but at the time I didn't know it. That's why you forgot me so easily because I never showed you how I really felt.'

I take a breath.

'We were reaped again. This time we swore to protect each other, keep each other alive. We were both fighting for the survival of the other. That's when you told me just how much you loved me. One night on the beach, you said how without me life was not worth living, that there was nothing for you. You told me I had to go back, for my family. I couldn't let you die though, I loved you too. Then we lost each other, that's when the Capitol got you. That's where the story ends.'

We just stay silent for a moment. Peeta pulls me into his arms and I sit with my head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. The rhythmic, thud, thud, thud calms me down. That's when the thought hits me.

'Hang on, I'll be right back.'

I sprint out the room and up the stairs into our bedroom. I pull open my dresser drawers, searching for the familiar object. My hands finally find it and I clasp my fingers around it before racing back downstairs again. I burst back into the living room. Peeta stares at me, completely confused.

'Hold out your hand.' I say.

He obeys and I drop the small, round object into his palm. The pearl. The pearl he gave me that day on the beach, the one where I felt the feeling of hunger. The day I began to realise how much I really loved Peeta. He runs his fingers over it, the way I used to when I was in 13 without him.

'I kept it. I used to hold it when you were gone and pray you were alright. That you would come back to me. You did.'

He just stares at it, his face completely blank. His eyes narrow and his lips tighten into a fine line. Then all of a sudden he stands up and looks right at me, the pearl still firmly in his hand. I jump back hoping it's not a flashback. I prepare to defend myself.

'Katniss.' He whispers. 'I remember.'

* * *

**I cried whilst writing again. When I wrote this I imagined what Peeta went through, all the pain, forgetting his whole past, loosing the one he loved the most. i just broke down, it broke my heart how he couldn't remember the love he'd had for Katniss. The line in the third book where he says 'I must have really loved you.' that bit sent me into floods of tears. I really got very emotional writing this and I hope you did reading it. I would just like to say a massive thank you to lulabelle12 for sending me the sweetest PM, saying I should be a serious author WOW thank you so much! So, I would like _90_ reviews before the next chapter. Can you guys help me with that? Thank you all so much for your AMAZING support so far, I couldn't of done it without you all! I hope you enjoyed the chapter and remember I need help with baby names! Love you all so much,**

**-Isabel :)**


	16. Unexpected

**Sorry for the wait! I didn't get many reviews last chapter and I was a little upset, I really put a lot of emotion into that chapter! But, you did get me to 90 reviews so I then knew I had to keep writing for all you dedicated people! Thank you sosososo much! I love you all, 90 reviews. WOW. Can you get me to 100? Enjoy!**

* * *

Since I showed Peeta the pearl his memory has gotten a little stronger. He still can't remember much of the first games but he remembers the day he gave me the pearl. He remembers that night too, when he told me he couldn't live without me. It's been fascinating to watch him as ever so slowly he begins to piece things together. It's like a jigsaw. Starting from the edges, beginning with the outline and working your way in until you get the final picture. It makes me happy to see his real memories begin to replace the shiny ones, his hold on reality to become ever stronger. But I now feel I've taken second place, he's sprinting past me as I struggle to keep up. He's doing well yet I don't seem to be either improving or declining, just stuck, stuck in second place. But whenever this thought crosses my mind I immediately feel guilty, at least I can remember the past three years clearly. I've lost a lot but I never lost myself.

* * *

**An Answered Prayer**

I had been complaining to Peeta for a few weeks that we needed to get out of District 12 before the baby came. I am now 30 weeks into my pregnancy and due in 10 weeks, I want to do one last thing with Peeta before we greet our daughter into the world. I couldn't help feeling like maybe someone had answered my prayers when Johanna called. It was a typical spring evening when I picked up the phone.

'Hello?' I ask.

'Katniss? Hi.'

'Johanna! Is that you?' I have to admit, I was shocked to hear Johanna's voice.

'No. ' I pause, unsure whether to continue. 'Of course it is. Who else would it be?

'Sorry.' I feel a little embarrassed .

'Anyway, I was calling to ask you something.' She continued.

'Ask me something? What?'

'Oh gosh Katniss, I'm getting married and I want you at my wedding.'

I'm dumbstruck, Johanna getting married? She must really love Cedar.

'Oh Johanna, that's fantastic! When is it?'

'I know. Me getting married, even I thought I would die alone.' She laughs. 'It's next week on Friday. I'm making it simple. No bridesmaids, no aisle. Basic, Just how I like it. Like I told you, I'm not the fluffy wedding type.'

'We'll be there. I'm so happy for you Johanna, Peeta will too. You're like his sister.'

'Really? I suppose he's like my brother.' I can hear her smiling through the phone. 'I'll see you next week Katniss.'

'See you Johanna.'

There's a click and the other line goes dead. I hang the phone back on the wall and walk into the sitting room.

'Why was Johanna calling?' Peeta asks.

'She's getting married. We've been invited to the wedding next week.'

Peeta stands up. 'Really? Wow, Johanna getting married. Never thought I'd hear that.'

'She said the same thing.' I laugh.

'So we're going to district 7? When?' He asks, there's a worried tone in his voice.

'It's next Friday, I said we'd be there. Do you not want to go?'

'I want to go Katniss, of course I do. I'm just worried about you, the baby's due so soon. Are you sure you want to travel?'

'Of course I do, I'm want to be there for Johanna. I may be a massive balloon but don't think that's going to stop me Peeta Mellark.'

I place my hands on my hips and he laughs.

'Oh Katniss, you do look funny. As long as you're sure, we'll go.'

'I'm sure. We can't skip out on Johanna, she'll want you there.'

'She'll want you too.' He says. 'She likes you more than you think, she's just tough to get to. But Johanna getting married, that's some news I never thought I'd hear.'

'I know. Even those of us who have completely given up can still find happiness.'

The meanings of my words resonate around us. It's true. Even the most broken can still be glued back together. Slowly, but they can.

* * *

**Johanna's Wedding  
**

The following Friday and Peeta and I are on the early train to District 7. I'm excited to go back there. I can remember little from the Victory Tour, my only memory is the terror that constantly surrounded me. I shake my head. _'Don't dwell on the past Katniss'_ I remind myself. _'You're in the present.' _The train begins to slow down and views of District 7 fill the windows. It's a solid mass of green as far as the eye can see. I remember now, trees everywhere, they even crawl up the mountainsides until they disappear beneath the clouds. A clearing emerges as we pull into the station. As we step off the train we are greeted by a smiling Johanna, it's really amazing to see her like this.

'Hey you two.'

She runs forward and gives Peeta a hug.

'Hey.'

Peeta hugs her back, I stand slightly awkwardly to the side until Johanna comes over and gives me a hug. Well, she tries to. It's rather hard to reach around my beach ball of a stomach.

'Wow. Look at how big you are!' She exclaims. 'Is it not difficult to walk?'

'Sometimes.' I respond. 'Usually if I've been standing for a long time.'

'I'll make sure there's always a seat then.' She says with a wink. 'Come on, it's starting soon.'

Johanna is having a civil ceremony in the Justice Building, only Peeta and I will be attending, but she's promised us a large party afterwards. An hour and a half later and Peeta and I are assembled in the registry office. The doors open and Cedar enters.

'Congratulations.' Peeta stands up and shakes his hand.

I make to do the same but Cedar stops me.

'Don't worry Katniss, stay sitting.'

I extend my hand. 'Congratulations by the way, Johanna really loves you.'

He smiles at this. 'Thanks. And for coming.'

We don't get to respond as Johanna enters. I turn and my breath is taken away. She's wearing a simple, knee length, white dress. The bow around the waist causes the skirt to flare out and I can't help but notice the small sprig of pine leaves pinned to the chest, rather like my mockingjay pin on my wedding dress. Her hair has been curled and it falls softly around her shoulders. She has the bare minimum of make-up on yet she still looks breathtaking. She reaches Cedar, who's smiling like a cheshire cat. The register begins to speak.

'We are gathered here today to join Johanna and Cedar as they join together in marriage. The ceremony will be kept simple, as requested. So, let us begin. Cedar Rossman, do you promise to be true to Johanna in good and bad times? Do you promise to be with her in sickness and in health? To love and honor her every day of your life?'

'I do.' Cedar says.

The register turns to Johanna. 'Johanna Mason, so you promise to be with Cedar in good and bad times? Do you promise to be with him in sickness and in health? To love and honor him every day of your life?'

'I do.' Johanna says.

'Then I know pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride.'

Cedar leans in and gives Johanna a quick, passionate kiss. They sign the wedding papers and the ceremony is over. It was simple, just how Johanna wanted it, yet perfect. Tears fall from my eyes and I notice Johanna's are glistening. She deserves this happiness, she had no one left but now she has Cedar. He will love her and look after her, I know he will. Johanna wasn't kidding about a big celebration, it seems as though half of District 7 has showed up. The town hall is crowded and I can't hear Peeta, even though he's sitting next to me. There's a quick dinner, another simple touch, Johanna wants most of the night to consist of celebrating and dancing. I'm surprised by this, Johanna always seemed so withdrawn, but as I watch her shimmy her way around the dance floor I realise there's more to her than meets the eye. She has confidence, that's obvious, but this is a whole new type. The confidence she had before was more defensive, the Johanna I see now is a happy confidence, it draws you to her. Then a thought clicks in my mind. This is the old Johanna, before the games, before the Capitol destroyed her. Cedar has brought her back and I couldn't be more grateful. Peeta nudges me.

'How about a quick dance? It's a slow song.'

'Yes. I've been sat down for long enough.'

He takes my hand and leads me onto the dance floor, I can already feel the weight of my stomach pulling against my back. I lean onto Peeta, needing his support. He moves cautiously, spinning me around gently.

'Are you alright?' He asks.

'Yes, I'm…'

Suddenly a sharp pain shoots through me, an agonized noise escapes my mouth. I double over, clutching my sides.

'Katniss! Katniss, what is it? Do you need to sit down? Is your back hurting?'

His hands are immediately around my waist, supporting me. I uncurl myself ever so slightly, just so I can look into his eyes. I see the fear I feel reflected in them. I open my mouth but no words come out. I clear my throat and try again.

'Peeta. The baby's coming.'

* * *

**So what did you think? Cliff hanger! :P I just wanted to thank you all VERY, VERY much for getting me to over 90 reviews, it's crazy how dedicated you have all been to this story. I love you all so much! Also, a shout out thank you to Leallison for your lovely reviews, honestly they are so inspiring and wonderful to read! Can you get me to 100 reviews? Pretty please? I have decided that at 100 reviews not only will I release a new chapter but a whole new story! It will be completely different from this one, I can't wait for you guys to read it! I'm so excited and I hope you'll enjoy it. Thank you all for your support and kind words. Much love,**

**-Isabel :)**


	17. She's Coming

**So I know it's quite a short chapter but I'm really busy. It's Friday tomorrow though so I'll be able to write more, yay! Anyways the baby's coming, eep. Enjoy!**

* * *

'She's coming, the baby's coming?'

Peeta's eyes widen, his mouth hanging open.

'No. I'm just having these contractions for fun.' I retort.

He get's the message; I need to go to the hospital. Now.

'Johanna, where's the hospital?' He asks.

'Not far from here. Follow me, I'll show you.'

I make to move but another contraction tears through my body. I cry out in pain and clutch my stomach.

'She can't walk.' Says Peeta.

Before I know it I'm being lifted off my feet.

'Then I'll carry her.' Cedar replies.

'Come on. Move, lady giving birth here.'

They all snap into action at the sound of my voice. Johanna leads the way as we hurry out of the town hall. About halfway to the hospital another contraction hits me. Cedar nearly drops me because I'm writhing around so badly. I realise that this is really happening and I'm suddenly very frightened at the prospect of this baby actually coming.

'We're here.' Johanna calls out.

We enter the building and I squint at the bright fluorescent lighting. It's all a blur of doctor's and nurses as they hurry me to a delivery room. Once inside I'm left to wait with Peeta until my water breaks.

'AHH! OH GOD! I yell.

The contractions have begun to get stronger and closer together. I grip the sides of the bed, hoping for some relief.

'Is there anything I can do Katniss?'

Peeta grabs my hand.

'Get the goddamn doctor and tell her to come and deliver this baby.' I snarl.

He hurries out the room. I should try in labour Katniss more often, it gets everything I want done more quickly. Peeta renters the room a doctor and nurse in tow.

'Hello Katniss, I'm Doctor Appleson. I'm here to help you deliver this baby. And this is Nurse Walters.' She points to the woman beside her. 'She's also here to help.'

'Great.' I stand up. 'Now can we get this baby out!'

It's like the baby could hear me because right then my water breaks.

'Alright Katniss.' Dr Appleson says. 'It's time.'

* * *

**The Push  
**

Two hours later and I'm sat on the bed, legs right up, pushing with all my might.

'That's it Katniss, we can nearly see the head. Keep going.' Nurse Walters urges.

'Mother of PEARL!' I scream.

I knew pregnancy would hurt but I didn't know pain this strong was possible. I will never have children ever again. EVER. Give me the arena back any day.

'It's alright darling, just breath. Breath.' Peeta tries to soothe me.

'Don't. Tell me. To breath.' I growl. 'You have no idea what this is like. OWW!'

I grip his hand as yet another contraction hits me. Peeta's face turns white, I'm probably cutting all the blood off.

'Alright, alright. No more breathing.'

He holds a damp cloth to my forehead.

'Thanks.' I sigh.

'Ok. We need you to push really hard now Katniss.' The nurse says.

I push, strangled noises of pain escaping my mouth. Please be the last one, I beg.

'One last push Katniss. One more.' Nurse Walters is really starting to annoy me.

I rest my head back and sigh. I'm exhausted, I have no energy left. I can't do this anymore.

'No.' I croak. 'I can't.'

'Yes. Yes you can Katniss.'

Peeta strokes my forehead, pushing my damp hair of my forehead.

'I CAN'T.'

I'm completely drained. I can't do this anymore.

'Please. For me.' Peeta pleads.

If it was anybody else I wouldn't have tried. But it's Peeta so I find any strength I can and give one last agonizing push. I cry out in pain and then it's over, relief spreads through my body.

'Here she is.' Dr Appleson says.

I hear a cry and then there she is, my beautiful baby daughter. Dr. Appleson places her in my arms.

'She's perfect.' Peeta coos.

And she is. Never have I ever felt so much love towards anything. As I hold her in my arms and stare into her beautiful little eyes, Peeta's eyes, I make an oath. I will protect her from any danger. No matter what. I have only ever felt this before with Prim. I would die for her survival.

'Do you want to cut the umbilical cord?' Dr Appleson asks.

'Yes.'

I take the scissors off her and place them in Peeta's hands.

'Together.' I say.

We cut it off and that's it. My little baby is a single person, about to start her journey through this confusing world. I'm not religious but in this very moment I say a little prayer. That my daughter will never have to see the horrors this world contains.

* * *

**So what did you think of Katniss' oath? I thought it was a nice little addition. A HUGE thank you to everybody who got me to 100 REVIEWS. WOW, you guys are AMAZING. You have all been so dedicated to me. I cannot thank you enough, I love you all SOSOSO much. I know I said my new story would come at 100 but I've been really busy so it goes up tomorrow! Yay! I can't wait for you to read it! Again, a MASSIVE thank you for all your lovely reviews, they mean so much to me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you all,**

**-Isabel :D**


	18. For Good

**Here is the long overdue Chapter.18! I know, I'm sorry its so late but I was busier than I thought this weekend so I wasn't able to write. Also, sorry it's so short! There's a longer one to come tomorrow. Other than that, enjoy!**

* * *

I just sit with my daughter for a while, watching her as she gently moves in my arms. I am amazed at how something so perfect can be brought into this world through so much pain. I would do it all again though. The pain I felt is nothing compared to the happiness of being able to hold your baby in your own arms. Something that you created through an act of love.

"I love you so much."

I say holding her tiny hand.

"I promise to protect you. I promise."

She looks at me with those bright blue eyes already filled with the kindness and love that I see in Peeta's. I stifle a yawn, in the magic of the moment I didn't realise how tired I was but it's caught up with me now.

"Peeta?" I ask.

"Yes?"

He appears from behind the bed where he was talking to .

"Will you take her? I need some rest."

"Of course I will darling." He gently takes her from my hands. "Come to daddy little one, I'll look after you."

"She has your eyes." I murmur, sleep creeping over me.

"She does but she's you. I can see it Katniss, she's just like you. Perfect."

"I love you Peeta." I whisper. I just hear his reply before sleep overcomes me.

"I love you too Katniss."

* * *

**Meanings  
**

I dream of Prim. Not a nightmare though, for once it's a dream. I meet her in the meadow, a carpet of yellow dandelions beneath our feet. She holds out her hand to me and I take it, I've missed her so much. I open my mouth but I can't speak, something seems to restrain any words from forming. She smiles.

"It's alright Katniss. I can hear you, I don't need words."

I notice the soft white glow around her and realise that this not a dream, I really am being visited by Prim. Angel Prim.

"I miss you." She says.

Silent tears begin to roll down my cheeks, if I could see Prim one more time, just once more, I would tell her I loved her, that I was sorry for ever causing her death.

"It's not your fault Katniss." She soothes. "Don't blame yourself, you were protecting me. I'm still with you. In here."

She reaches out and touches my heart, the tears begin to fall faster now.

"Don't cry. Be happy because I'm happy. I'm at peace now."

I nod and she holds my head between her hands and smiles.

"That's my Katniss." She says. "She's beautiful, your baby. I'll protect her Katniss. You kept me safe and now I will keep her safe. I'll watch over her, I'll be her guardian angel."

I notice that the meadows is beginning to fade and I realise the visit will soon be over. I start to panic; I can't loose Prim again.

'Shh." She soothes me. "Remember I'm always here."

She lets go of my hand and slowly begins to float backwards, towards the light shining above.

"Stay with Peeta, Katniss. Don't let him go, no matter what, don't let him go." I wonder what she can mean by this. "Remember what he has always meant to you."

I nod my head. I love you Prim, I think.

"I love you too." She replies and then she's gone. Vanished into the bright white light, leaving only the yellow carpet of dandelions. My eyes snap open.

"Dandelions." I gasp.

"What?"

Peeta seems surprised by my waking.

"Remember what you mean to me."

"Me?" Peeta questions.

"Yes. You are my dandelion in the spring, and so is she."

I look over at my little baby, asleep in Peeta's arms. The perfect life form that can do no wrong, bring only joy and happiness into my life. I thought only Peeta could give me that. I was wrong. They both can.

"She's Dandelion, Peeta. Little Dandelion."

"Dandelion Primrose Mellark." Peeta whispers. "I like that."

He kneels down beside me and I take his hand that holds Dandelion. We are family, joined together by unbreakable bonds. I know that in this moment our whole lives will change. But this time it's for the good.

* * *

**So, what did you think? Do you like the name? I choose it because I decided that the baby, like Peeta, brought hope into Katniss' life. I thought she should be named after something that meant a lot to Katniss but wasn't obvious like 'Hope' or 'Harmony', etc. Sorry it was a short chapter but there's a long one tomorrow! Just so you know, the story line will become more 'twists and turns' soon. Thank you again for the 100 REVIEWS, I am so grateful you don't understand! So, I've decided _120 reviews_ before Chapter 19 is released. Can you do that? Pretty please? A huge thank you for every single one of you that reviews, favourites, author alerts, PM's, I love to see/get them! I love you all,  
**

**-Isabel :)  
**


	19. Chances

**I got 120 reviews, thank you so much! So because of that here's Chapter.19, enjoy!**

* * *

A couple of days later Dandelion and I are given a clear bill of health and are allowed to travel back to 12. We say our goodbyes to Johanna and Cedar and wish them luck in their first year of marriage. Johanna has already told me she does not want children but I have a feeling Cedar will change that, Peeta certainly did for me. Once on the train I'm given some time to sit and mull over the last couple of days. I am still glowing from the birth of my daughter but I don't think that will ever wear off. I stare out the window watching as the shapes of the green trees merge into one big green blur, I know we'll be back in 12 before nightfall. Peeta's sat across from me holding little Dandelion in his hands gently rocking her as she gurgles in approval. I smile; it's moments like these that are so simple, so pure that make my heart rush with affection towards my husband and daughter.

"If it wasn't for you, we wouldn't have her." I say.

"But if it wasn't for your strength and determination we wouldn't have her." Peeta responds.

He's so humble; even if it was his actions that have brought good he refuses to accept the credit. I wish he would though because he deserves it, much more than I do.

"Yes but Peeta.."

He cuts me off. "Yes but nothing Katniss."

I sigh, this is the one thing I can never win on. I'll try but Peeta always says something to make it look like he did nothing. I love him for it though, it makes him so perfect. Dandelion breaks the moment by letting out a squawk and soon it turns to full on tears. Peeta tries to soothe by rocking her but to no avail.

"Give her here, I think she's hungry."

He hands her over to me and sure enough she is. Soon enough she is quietly feeding. I wince slightly, I am still not quite used to the sensation.

"How did you know that?" Peeta asks.

I shrug my shoulders. "Good guess."

"Come on, give yourself a little more credit."

"Then give yourself some!"

This comes out a little sharper than expected and I see a look of hurt fill Peeta's eyes.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to sound like that."

"It's fine, I understand. Don't worry, I know you were joking."

There we go, humble Peeta. Always ready to forgive and forget. I wish I could be more like him but sorry is not a word that I can say very easily. The rest of the journey is filled with an awkward silence and I'm glad when the familiar sights of District 12 begin to race past the window. As we pull into the train station Peeta turns to me.

"Honestly Katniss it's fine."

"Really? I didn't mean for it to come out like that, I just don't think and then.."

"Really, it's fine." He presses his finger to my lips and takes my hand. "Now let's show Dandelion her home."

As we disembark onto the platform I notice Greasy Sae running towards us. At first I think she's just keen to see the baby but as she comes closer I see a look of panic across her face.

"Katniss!" She calls and I notice the hysteria in her voice. "Katniss!"

"Sae, what is it? What's wrong?" I demand.

"You're needed in four." She heaves.

"Four? Why would I be needed in four?"

I realise the answer to my question as Greasy Sae begins to speak again. Dread fills my body.

"It's your mother Katniss. She's sick."

* * *

**District Four**

I'm back on the train within minutes, Peeta by my side. We decided to leave Dandelion behind. Greasy Sae will look after her whilst we are in four, however long that may be.

"It will be alright Katniss, she'll get better." Peeta tries to reassure me.

"What if it's not? We don't know how bad she is and, and"

I trail off thoughts of my mother filling my mind. She's not strong anymore, not since Prim's death. She has little left to fight for, there's me but I don't think that's enough. She's lost so much, maybe she's loosing herself. The rest of the journey passes in silence and all too soon we are stepping onto the platform at 4. I guess Greasy Sae phoned to tell them we were coming because there's a nurse waiting to escort us to the hospital.

"How is she?" I whisper.

"Doctor Hainslee will fill you in on everything when we get to the hospital." She replies.

I nod my head. Peeta squeezes my hand, it'll be alright he's trying to say, it'll be OK. I am not reassured. As we approach the hospital I begin to feel faint. Peeta grips my arm, steadying me.

"Are you ok?" He asks.

"I'm fine. Just don't let go of my hand. No matter what, don't let go."

"I won't." He replies.

* * *

**Chances  
**

Once inside we are greeted by Doctor Hainslee.

"What's wrong with her? Will she make it?" I demand.

"Katniss, why don't you come and sit down."

He guides us into a little side room and I sit in a squeaky plastic chair, still clinging on to Peeta's hand. Dr Hainslee takes a breath.

"Katniss, you're mother was admitted to the hospital this morning. She collapsed under unknown circumstances and struggled to remain standing once she came round. When she came in we ran some tests and it looks like she's got pneumonia. " He pauses for a moment. "Her right lung his completely collapsed, we doing everything we can to get it going again."

"What are her chances?" I question.

"Well." He swallows. "It doesn't look like she's going to make it."

* * *

**What did you think of the ending? Cliffhanger! And a much needed twist to the story! What do you guys think is going to happen? I know it's a little short but I thought the twist made up for that! And sorry for the delay posting but schoolwork is crazy! I'll post again after 130 reviews and my new story will be up! I hope you are as excited as I am, hehe :P Thank you guys for your ongoing love and dedication, it is so inspiring. Much love,**

**-Isabel :)**


	20. A Connection

**Okay, so firstly I am so extremely sorry for my far to long absence! I had schoolwork, then it was my birthday and then I went away and had no laptop. Okay, I should stop making excuses. Honestly, I am sosososososooso sorry to all my loyals who have been waiting for ever and ever for this chapter. Please, enjoy chapter 20!**

* * *

I am completely paralyzed. The words the doctor just spoke still bouncing round my head threatening to burst out of my skull. I cannot loose my mother. I just can't. Prim died nearly three years ago and those scars haven't even begun to heal. I just sit there unseeing and unspeaking, numb to the world around me. It takes me a while to realise the muffled noise next to my right ear is actually someone trying to speak to me.

"W-what?" I stutter.

"Oh thank god Katniss." Peeta's relieved voice fills my ears. "You scared me. You completely froze, I had no idea what happened to you."

I just turn my head the other way and squeeze my eyes shut in an attempt to keep the tears from falling.

"Katniss?" I ignore Peeta. "Oh Katniss."

He pulls my into his arms, I don't resist. Without Peeta I honestly have no idea what would have happened to me. Would I still be sat in that chair by the fire, a lost cause, no hope left , nothing to fight for. The girl on fire extinguished to a pile of ashes. I shake my head rousing myself from my thoughts. I get so lost; I guess its just part of who I am now. Katniss. Katniss the little lost sheep.

* * *

**Determination  
**

When I visit my mother I see just how sick she is. Her aged face looks even more withered, the lines etched deeply into her skin, her lips have drained of any colour and remain a dilute pink, her closed eyelids sag like old leather and her steel grey hair falls in tired wisps around her face. It's her outstretched hand that scares me the most, nearly every bone is visible, the skin a sallow yellow colour. I am reminded of the starving children you used to see in District 12 and I have to fight the urge to throw up.

"K-k-Ka-niss?" She heaves.

I rush over to her and grasp that skeletal hand.

"I-is that y-y-ou?"

"Yes, its me." I notice her open her mouth. "Shh Mother. Don't speak. It's alright, I'm here."

I can't stand the sight of her quivering body as she tries to utter only a few words. I stay right beside for over an hour, stroking her forehead and humming a soft tune to her. When returns I have to force myself to let go of her. I back out, never dropping my gaze from her face even when the door is closed and blocking my view I just remain their staring straight through it.

"What's wrong with her?" Peeta asks.

It's a good thing too because I don't feel like speaking.

"She has severe pneumonia. I told you her right lung had collapsed and it looks like her left one isn't going to hold on for much longer. By the looks of it she's had this for a while, maybe she didn't notice it or just thought it was a cold. But it's possible she.." pauses. "She…"

"She didn't want to tell anyone." I finish for him.

"Yes, exactly."

It wouldn't surprise me if my mother took the third option. She probably thought that if she told no one she would just die and she'd finally be free from all her nightmares. It doesn't surprise me; I have felt the same way more than once. But I'm not going to let her die. Not when I can show her the beauty this world can contain.

"She is not going to die." I say. "You have to keep her alive." I turn to .

"Katniss, even I know he cannot make that promise." Peeta soothes.

"Fine."

I turn and leave the room. My mother is not going to die. I will make sure of that.

* * *

**A Connection**

Once inside the hospital the small flicker of determination I felt disappears. I listen to the slow beeping of the machine that's keeping track of my mother's heartbeats. They could be her last ones. _'No Katniss' _I tell myself. '_She's going to live. You're going to make sure of that.' _I cross over to her bed and take her hand again. I take a deep breath.

"Can you hear me?" I whisper.

She squeezes my hand. I clear my throat and continue.

"You're sick. I'm not going to pretend your not. But you have to live. You have to live for me, for Dandelion. That's my baby's name. Dandelion, you'd love her. She has Peeta's eyes." I smile weakly. "If you die, you'll never get to see her and she'll never get to see you. We can't let that happen can we?"

Maybe I'm just imagining it but I swear I see my mother's head give a slight shake.

"You have me, don't forget that, and now you have Dandelion. You can't leave me, I need you. Prim's gone but we have each other, we have each other. Don't forget that." I sink to my knees, tears streaming down my face. "Don't forget that." I whisper.

I stay on my knees, my shoulders shaking as the tears wrack through my body. I have never realised how much my mother needs me, how much she really means to me. All this time I thought I could live on without her but I love her as much as I love Prim. I need her. I really, truly need her. I feel a faint squeeze again. I look up to see my mother's grey eyes staring back at mine. Her mouth opens and closes but I can't hear anything, I lean in closer.

"D-don't c-c-cry K-aniss. You g-got me. I w-will fight."

She breathes in sharply, I can see how much energy it took for her to whisper those words to me. I lean forward and kiss her on the forehead and return a small squeeze. I stay there until she falls back asleep her hand in mine, our understanding of each other stronger than ever. I know she will not be giving up any time soon.

* * *

**So, what did you guys think? Did you like how Katniss realised how much she really loves her mother? Don't worry though, I'm not making it all fluffy bunnies and rainbows there will be dark moments and tension in the following chapters. Again, so frickin' sorry for my overly long absence.I can't believe you guys have got me to nearly 140 reviews! I love you all so much! 150 reviews before the next chapter gets released, can you do that? As a late birthday present? ;) Thank you all again, I love you all.**

**-Isabel :)**


	21. Missing

**Ok, Ok. I know, I didn't post for ages, just after I said I would post soon. But the odds were not in my favour because our internet pole collapsed, leaving us without internet for a week. I had the story all ready, I just couldn't post it! We got the internet back this morning and posting this is the first thing I did! I really am sorry but it was out of my control! Anyway, please enjoy the story!**

* * *

I stay beside my mother's bed, her hand clasped in mine, watching the wracked breathing as her chest rises and falls. I hear the door behind me open but I keep my eyes trained on my mother.

"You should get some rest Katniss."

Peeta. I should've known he'd be worrying about me.

"I'm fine, I don't need rest."

"You've been awake for over 12 hours, you need to sleep at some point."

I snort at this. Of all people Peeta should know that lack of sleep are waters my body navigates with ease. Two games, one war and the hundreds of nightmares that follow have taught me that.

Peeta's voice takes a harsher tone. "I'm being serious Katniss. I can stay with your mother."

It's strange to hear Peeta getting annoyed but in some ways it's nice, to feel protected. I'm not used to it but it makes me feel secure, safe and I like it. I stand up, leaving one last kiss on my mother's soft cheek before I turn to Peeta.

"Alright." I say entering his open arms. "I'll go to bed."

It's not until I am finally collapsing into bed that I realise how tired I am. Even the scratchy sheets and slight smell of bleach don't stop sleep from washing over me. I'm in the woods, walking over a soft carpet of pine needles with little Dandelion in my hands when suddenly a great black muttation lumbers towards us. I try to run but I'm frozen to the spot, I scream but nothing comes out and then I'm staring into the snake-like eyes of President Snow, the scent of blood filling my nose as he takes my baby and kills her. I wake up screaming, the sheets wrapped tightly around my body and a layer of sweat over my brow. Almost immediately Peeta's holding me in his arms, trying desperately to soothe me but I can't calm down. My breathing is coming out in short, sharp breaths and I try to get a sense of reality but the nightmare still plays in my head.

"He's not alive." I whisper. "He's not alive, he's not alive, he's dead."

I screw my eyes shut, focusing on what I am saying. _He's not alive, he's not alive_. Eventually my breathing slows and the nightmare begins to clear, allowing me to regain control of my thoughts. I stay in Peeta arms, after a particularly bad nightmare he never says anything, he just holds me until I finally calm down.

"I need her Peeta."

His chest muffles my voice.

"What darling?"

"I need Dandelion. I've been so focused on my mother, I forgot how much I missed her."

Peeta strokes my hair. "I know, I miss her too."

I'm not expecting it but all of a sudden tears are falling from my eyes. The one thing I want the most right now in the world is my baby and I can't have her. My shoulders shake as the sobs wrack through my body. I think of little Dandelion's face smiling up at me, the cute little gurgling noises that she makes and my heart breaks, I know I should never have left her. The tears keep falling, faster and faster, more and more. It's like there's a hole where my heart should be, a missing piece in a jigsaw puzzle. I have never needed something so badly.

"I have to have her Peeta, I can't go without her any longer."

"I know, I know." Peeta soothes. "But we can't have her in a hospital, it's too unsafe for a new born baby. Think of all the sickness that could kill her."

This only makes me cry harder, knowing I can't have her.

"Peeta, please, please." I beg.

"Your mother's getting better, we'll be out soon and then you can have Dandelion back." He takes my head in his hands. "All good things come to those who wait."

I nod. I know he's right but I don't know how much longer I can last.

* * *

**Home  
**

Two days later and my mother has been given permission to leave as long as she comes back to District 12 with us. I cannot contain my excitement; I am going home, going back to my little baby. I guess good things really do come to those who wait. Its not just the prospect of seeing little Dandelion again that makes me happy but that my mother pulled through, that she will be ok and that she and I can work on our relationship. Hopefully we can piece it back together, make up for all those lost years. I do love her, seeing her near death has made me realise what I hid all these years.

"Are you ready?"

Peeta's voice interrupts my thoughts. I look up to see him smiling, his hand outstretched. I take his hand and hold out my other one to my mother. She smiles at me, the first smile I have seen in months, and takes my hand.

"Come and meet your grand-daughter." I say. "Come and meet Dandelion."

The train doors part and the bright sunshine of District 12 floods the compartment, welcoming us home.

* * *

**Katniss' mother survives, yaay! And she's even come back home with Katniss. The next chapter will of course be Katniss seeing Dandelion again. I know a mother wouldn't leave her child but I wanted to show the bond Katniss has with her daughter and I felt her missing Dandelion was a chance to show that. I hope I said the right things but I'm only 15 so I have no idea what it's like to have a child and *touchwood* I won't until I'm a sensible age. I hope you enjoyed it, please leave a review. Sorry for my absence! Much love, **

**-Isabel :)**


	22. A Letter

**Ok, so I know its been 4 days since I last posted but I've been really busy. I've had controlled assessments which are 25% of my final exam so I've been focusing on those. I was listening to The Hunger Games soundtrack whilst writing this and it is AMAZING. Seriously, listen to it on youtube or itunes or something. At least listen to 'Just a Game' by Birdy, it descirbes Katniss' feeling towards Peeta in the 1st book PERFECTLY. Pm me or review me if you listen to it or if you just wanna fangirl :D. Enjoy!**

* * *

**Dandelion  
**

Once off the train I practically run all the way back to our home, I know I should stay with Peeta and my mother but I just can't wait any longer. I keep rushing ahead, each step getting me closer and closer to my precious little baby, until finally I am stood hand raised, ready to knock the door when Greasy Sae opens it.

"How did you know I was outside?" I question.

She laughs. "Katniss, I could hear you coming from a mile away."

"Where is she? I can't wait any longer."

"She's just woken up, guess she knew mummy was coming home." Greasy Sae laughs again.

I push past her and dash up the stairs to my room where, inside her small white cot, lies my beautiful baby. My little Dandelion. I'm beside her in a flash, leaning over the cot and looking at her little smiling face.

"Hi baby." She lets out a small gurgle. "Hi my little angel."

I scoop her up in my arms and touch her tiny little nose.

"Mommy missed you, she missed you so, so much." I shake my head. "Why did I leave you? I'll never leave you again." Tears begin to roll down my cheeks. "I promise. I promise, I promise."

"So do I."

The voice behind me makes me jump.

"Peeta." I sniff and wipe away the tears. "I didn't know you were there."

"I couldn't ruin such a perfect moment."

He smiles and crosses over to me, wrapping his arms around my waist as he looks down at Dandelion.

"She's so perfect." He says.

"I missed her so much Peeta."

"I did too, so much."

I look up at him and notice the slight glassiness in his eyes. Tears. I can understand why. The compassion, love and protection a parent feels towards their child create the strongest bond in the world. Peeta and I have realised just how strong it is and we never intended to stretch it again.

"We'll never leave you again little one." Peeta says.

"Never again." I repeat.

We stand there for a moment, frozen in this moment of love, a true family moment, as we both absorb our feelings and create our promises. I will never regret having my daughter, not ever. She is the most beautiful and perfect human being in the world. So beautiful. So perfect. I clear my throat.

"Let's take you to see your grandma. How about it?"

She gives out a little gurgle.

"Yeah? You want to?"

Another little gurgle.

"Ok then." I turn to Peeta. "I love you Peeta Mellark. Thank you for helping to bring such a perfect being into this world."

"I love you too Katniss. We did it together, created our perfect little daughter."

I stay quiet, savoring his words as the tears still roll silently down my face and we slowly descend the stairs into the hallway.

"Here she is mum. Here's your granddaughter."

* * *

**A Meeting  
**

My mothers face immediately lights up as she rushes over, I place Dandelion in her arms and she stares down at her a smile breaking over her face.

"Oh Katniss, she's beautiful. Look, she has Peeta's eyes and your mouth. Oh, wow." She whispers.

My mother immediately begins to cry. At first I think it's just her being in the moment but she's crying so ferociously that I worry there's something wrong.

"Are, are you alright?"

"Yes, yes of course I am. This just reminds me of when I had you. It was just, oh goodness," She sniffs. "So perfect. You never forget you first born; you never forget any of your children, but particularly your first. It's so new, all these feelings, the love you feel. I can remember it so clearly with you and Prim."

I notice that this is the first time my mother has said my sister's name without a struggle.

"Treasure it you two, it only lasts so long."

"We will, we promise." Peeta speaks up.

"We do." I finish

She nods. "Of course you do." And hands me back Dandelion. "Dandelion, where did you get that name from?"

"Dandelion in the spring." I whisper back.

They both look at me with confusion on their faces. Of course, they don't know. Nobody does.

"Oh, it's." I swallow, tears threatening to spill out of my eyes again. "It's Peeta."

"Me?" Peeta questions. "I don't get it."

"You're my dandelion in the spring. You bring me hope when I get find it. Help me continue life, no matter how bad my losses. You're always there to catch me when I fall." I pause. "It's silly really."

I can feel a blush creeping across my cheeks and I stare down at my hands.

"No Katniss, it's perfect. I never knew I meant that to you."

He crosses over to me and pulls me, gently so as not to hurt Dandelion, into a hug.

"You two deserve each other so much." My mother whispers. "After everything, I'm glad you ended up together."

Peeta holds out his arm, inviting my mother into our embrace. He pulls her in and I wrap my arms around them whilst I murmur "We're a family now."

* * *

**A Letter  
**

Dandelion has been put back to bed, Peeta has gone down to the bakery to make sure everything's running smoothly and bake some fresh bread for lunch and my mother is resting in her room whilst I clean out the guest room for her. I'm shifting a few papers around in the drawers of the desk to make space for a few bits and bobs when I notice a pile of old papers with a small note attached. I pick it up, reading the messy writing:

_'I guess you'll read these when the time is right._

_ -Haymitch'_

I frown, confused as to what this note can mean. Read what? The old papers the note is tied to? And why would I read them 'when the the time is right'? Intrigued, I pull the knot apart. I stop for a second, I swear I recognize it, the knot. I shake my head, I've made many knots in my life, that's probably why I remember it. I pull the first folded piece of paper of the pile and open it up. I frown again and then I gasp, my hand flying to my open mouth. I'd recognize the handwriting anywhere. It's a letter. Its addressed to me. And its from my sister.

* * *

**DUN! DUN! DUN! What d'ya think of the ending? Good enough cliffhanger? What do you think is gonna happen? Leave a review, they are so gratefully received! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, now go listen to The Hunger Games. NOW! Thanks for reading! Much love,**

**-Isabel :)**


	23. A Note To You All

Hey guys, I will not be writing for a long time because I am going away to Italy! I'll be gone from the 10th-25th of July, so I won't be posting. Apologies! Hope you have a good holiday :)


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